WHY I HAVE SUCH A GOOD MARRIAGE .....The Lord will show you how to be a repairer of breeches, and a blessed peacemaker!
WHY I HAVE SUCH A WONDERFUL MARRIAGE AFTER 13 (23) YEARS OF LIFE WITH MY HUSBAND...............I HAVE A SMALL
VISION FOR WHERE JESUS WANTS TO TAKE THE CHURCH!!
How does passion and unity continue to get better? Well I had some thoughts on the subject today! I got a letter from a friend this morning, which made me start thinking of Ps.133. "Behold how good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It's like precious ointment.....it's like
the dew on the mountains.....there has the Lord commanded the blessing! It made me start thinking of my good marriage, and why other's aren't so good, and why there is such dis-unity in the church.
Then I read part of David Wilkerson's newest letter to the church called "Satan seeks to devour you." He specifically addresses marriages under attack! Lives under attack. I thought of the scripture in Ecc. "The little foxes spoil the vine." It made me realize why love and passion is ever increasing in my own marriage..........BECAUSE WE GO AFTER, AND DEAL WITH THE "LITTLE FOXES!" Many married people don't even see the whiles
of the devil to destroy them and their relationships. I know that after years of marriage, the offences, criticisms, accusations, divisions
(demiliatrized zones) cause people to build walls against one another. So instead of becoming closer, they become worlds apart....I want to say
DEMONS APART.....DEMONIC STRONGHOLDS set in, and passion and love are out the window! We need to learn to put on love rather than pride.
To put on honesty, sincerity, and have the law of kindness in our mouths.
Rm. 12:5 "So we being many are one body in Christ, and everyone members of one another". 1 Cor.10:17 "for we being many are ONE BREAD, and
one body, for we are all partakers of that one bread." 1Cor.1:10 "Now I beseech you , brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and that there be NO DIVISIONS AMONG YOU, but that you be perfectly joined together......in the same mind, and in the same judgment! THIS MAY BE EXTREMELY HARD FOR YOU TO BELIEVE, BUT I ACTUALLY LIVE WITH A MAN IN A "SPIRIT OF UNITY!" We fight for unity,
and to make sure there are no divisions between us! We deal with, kill, the "little foxes" that come to spoil our
relationship! Rather than being offended, we look to feed each other with understanding when there are problems. We seek the Lord, and humble ourselves to one another in the fear of the Lord. And we walk in this same spirit with the christians we relate to.
2 Co.13:11 "Finally, brethren, Be perfect, be of good comfort, be of one mind, live in peace, and the God of love and peace shall be with you.
Ep. 4:3 "Endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." Ph.1:27 "only let you conversation be as it becometh the gospel of Christ,
that whether I come and see you, or else be absent, I may hear of your affairs, that you stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel." 1Pet.3:8 "Be you all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous." In Phil. 4:2 Paul beseeches two of his loved ones to be of the same mind. Col. 2:2 "That their hearts might BE COMFORTED, being knit together in LOVE, and
unto all riches of the full assurance of understanding to the acknowledgment of the MYSTERY OF GOD, and of the Father, and of Christ."
DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE I HAVE MET, WHO DON'T EVEN BELIEVE UNITY IS EVEN POSSIBLE? They don't even have faith in what God say's
in His word or what He promises to do for those who love Him. He stands behind women who are looking to love and do God's will in their husbands lives. And a woman of God has faith that God will deal with her husband if he refuses her kind words. She doesn't look to beat him into submission,
she knows and trusts in God's love and intentions for their marriage. Many marriages get familiar with.........DISUNITY, STRIFE and they take on an unbelieving spirit that refuses to think unity is possible! When you loose a bad spirit into your marriage, contrary to love and faith, do you think it will sprout? If you loose love and faith, and have hope against hope, don't you think the God of all the Heaven's and earth is able to stand behind His Sprit? That's the spirit, the food you should be feeding your family. You need to think about what table you are eating from, the devils or God's?
For the bread, your words are life or death. If your mouth is an open grave, and everyone that EATS of the bread, the reaping will not be good! If
you fling forth evil things how can you hope good to come from it?
I have to say here, There were many things that divided my husband and I when I first met him. And the first few years of our relationship were not
really easy, because I doubted God and him, and didn't really know His heart towards me, or the Lord's to help us. He had more faith and trust in
the Lord regarding me, while I was the despairing unbeliever, because I was offended and unhealed regarding men in general. I let the little foxes in
the door all the time and was a bit slow in chasing them back out the door. (contrary thoughts against him, merciless thoughts, where I didn't have much mercy in what I thought he was doing wrong. I hadn't removed the log from my eye to help remove the twig in his. I had gotten to the place in my life, where I was not content to live with DIVISIONS, and in a spirit of DISUNITY. I had lived in pretense too long in my past, and it had cost me
too much. I crossed over a line before I ever met my husband, that I would FIGHT FOR UNITY! There is NO COMFORT, when you have to live in a house divided among itself. When you have to hide, lie and pretend, and play God for someone who doesn't have a grip on their emotions. I decided I wasn't going to play God anymore. I was going to live honestly, and let the chips fall where they may, and let God be God. I got to the place when I met my husband, that I was going to be honest, sincere, speak the truth in love, and I WAS WILLING TO PUT THE RELATIONSHIP ON THE LINE FOR
THE SAKE OF TRUTH! I wasn't going to hide, lie, and,only give "most of my heart", not "ALL OF MY HEART."
I heard a man talking about Ananias and Sapphira, and the principal of "holding back."
Whenever I have chosen to "hold back", a portion of my heart from my husband........not loving him with all my heart, mind and strength, not being open with him about my thoughts and emotions, it has brought DIVISION INTO OUR RELATIONSHIP! I know when I have done this, it's been a reflection of not loving the Lord with all my heart, mind, and strength. When I'm open and honest with Our Father, he helps me to be open and
honest with my husband.
How to keep the devil from getting ground in our lives. 1. By not forsaking the assembling, but exhorting one another. I see that when we do assemble, whether it be with our husband, or fellow Christian's, if we are half-hearted, we lie, are insincere, pretentious, content to be divided and are not hearing from God and speaking the truth in love.......UNITY ISN'T THERE! God is a spirit of truth and His spirit visits those walking in the light. He doesn't fellowship deceit....the father of lies.
2. Forgiveness.....THE BIG TEMPTATION, Jesus refers to in the Lords Prayer. "Forgive us our sins, as we forgive others......lead us not into the temptation of being unforgiving......DELIVER US FROM THIS GREAT EVIL! If we have a forgiving spirit, we can tell the truth in the right spirit, without sounding self-righteous.
3. If you have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, GLORY NOT....(how many people get familiar with running on STRIFE GAS). Strife is part of lying, and pretense. .where strife is so familiar, they cant' even tell they are striving? They loose a bad spirit on the earth and don't even care.
DON'T LIE TO YOURSELF....when your in strife. The devil will start talking to you....tickling your senses! It creates all kinds of confusion and evil
work! Blessed are the PEACE MAKERS, NOT THE STRIFE MAKERS!!!!
So......If 1 Cor. 10:17 is REALLY TRUE...."for we being many are ONE BREAD"????? What kind of bread are you?? What kind of bread is your marriage?? How about the Christians you walk with?? I remember speaking to a woman several years ago who was asking me what kind of church she should go
to back in Wisconsin where she lived. I said to her, "what ever you do, look very closely at the pastor and his wife. Ask yourself, do they walk in a spirit of faith, love, and unity? Can they work through their own problems, and do they share testimony about how the Lord helps them work through their divisions, so they can help other's too? See what ingredients are in their bread (spiritually speaking). Are they open, honest, do they lie, hide
and pretend like they have it all together? Are they willing to share the battles of their relationship and how Jesus helps them, in an honest, open transparent spirit? Do you hear the TESTIMONY OF JESUS in how they work through their divisions, evil imaginations, accusations, and how The Lord has helped them fight for unity and love? BECAUSE........if they don't do it with each other......they won't CONTAIN a spirit to help the children of
God do it either! Is there bread full of artificial ingredients?"
One thing many of my friends and I have in common is, "we didn't grow up in Christian families, where we heard and witnessed how Jesus helped our parents work through the battles of life. How they dealt with the "little foxes" that spoiled the vine. Most of us saw people who lived a passionless, pretentious, divided life, where they hid from each other. "Hide not yourself from your own flesh", it says in Isaiah. I
decided early on, I was not going to hide from my husband......I was not going to hide anymore from the Lord. I wasn't going to be a with-holder
and settle for a passionless, dark, deceitful way of life. There are times I wondered if my husband would throw me in the gutter for being honest,
but I knew if I really loved him, how could I hold divisions in my heart against him? I went to him (not always, but I try to) in a spirit of honesty, sincerity, humility, and faith because I love him. When I question his integrity, I tell him, because I love him. Our children....and God's children have gotten to benefit from our divisions, and hear how we dealt with them. WE ENDED UP BE AN EXAMPLE FOR OTHERS WHO NEVER HAD PARENTS WHO WOULD BE REAL, HONEST, AND FEED THEM WITH UNDERSTANDING TO HOW JESUS HELPED THEM WITH THEIR PROBLEMS.
We FIGHT NOT TO LET THE BREAD (OUR RELATIONSHIP) get moldy. Beware of the leaven of the Pharisee's whichis hypocrisy! We don't practice hypocrisy with each other. And because I'm willing, and He's taught me to walk in a spirit of LOVING THE LORD WITH ALL MY HEART, MIND AND STRENGTH, I can love other's the way I have been loved. AND KEEP PRESSING ON TO BE BETTER EACH DAY! The love and passion in our lives is
ever increasing instead of decreasing like the couples in the world. Isn't that how we should live as the body Of Christ too? I pray that the spirit of love, faith, and truth? What Jesus has given my husband and I would is a precious gift we can impart to all our friends. So they will want to follow
our example..... That the world could see Jesus lives by the way they love each other!
Jesus prayed in John 17......that we would be sanctified by the truth of His Word. He SANCTIFIED himself unto the truth, that we might be sanctified
unto the truth.....He prayed for ALL THOSE WHO WOULD BELIEVE ON HIM, BECAUSE OF THE WORDS OF OTHERS! DON'T YOU REALIZE THAT YOUR HUSBAND COULD COME TO BELIEVE MORE IN JESUS BY THE WORDS YOU SPEAK TO HIM???? Jesus PRAYED THAT WE WOULD ALL BE ONE!! As He is in the Father and the Father IN Him, THAT WE WOULD BE ONE.......IN HIM! That the world would see and believe in Him by the love we have
one for another!
His prayer was that we would all be one in Him......and though we might be far from it, we all will be one in heaven, and we can do our best to fight
for the unity of the faith on the earth! (Why not take on faith to deal with the dis-unity here on the earth.) It's all going to be seen and known for what it is one day anyway, don't you want to be on God's side when the dust settles? YOU ARE CALLED TO BE A PEACE MAKER, so TAKE ON FAITH,
to do God's will in ALL THE LIVES WHICH YOU TOUCH!! Don't be indifferent to the divisions in your heart towards your husband. Life isn't about
you, it's about you making it your food to do God's will. I don't want Jesus to have to straighten out my problems for me when we see Him face to face, because I was a fainting, indifferent, give up, complaining girl. The scripture we had put on our wedding cake said......."We pray that the
world would SEE AND BELIEVE THAT JESUS LIVES BY THE WAY.......WE LOVE ONE ANOTHER!! YOU HAVE EVERYTHING TO DO WITH THE WORLD, AND ESPECIALLY YOUR CHILDREN SEEING AND BELIEVING THAT JESUS LIVES BECAUSE THE WAY YOU LOVE YOUR HUSBAND AND THEM!
Saturday, March 21, 2009
a FAITHFUL MAN, WHO CAN FIND?????
I was thinking today about why the scriptures say that. IT'S TRUE. Most men give themselves to their appetites, passions, emotions and
desires, and are overcome by them. A man full of faith, and self sacrifice who can find, they are rare. Most men WILL NOT DENY THEMSELVES, and pick up their cross and follow Jesus, so they live lives of self indulgence.
Most men are not faithful in relationships, not full of faith, not willing to do God's will in people's lives, so they are overcome by lust and worldliness by DEFAULT. They can't control their lusts and appetites for worldliness, because God gives His Spirit of self control TO THOSE WHO LOVE AND OBEY HIM, those who REALLY CARE for each other with more than lip service.
Many of the men I have known sacrifice relationships with wives, children, friends, and are overcome by their lusts or worldliness,
due to selfishness. Look what the bible says about JOB. "I was eyes to the blind, feet to the lame, THE CAUSE I KNEW NOT I SEARCHED OUT"
Many men live slothful lives, void of understanding. They are the greater cause in their lives, not the Lord, God's family, or even their own family.
They live life according to their selfish desires and self gratifications, without a whole lot of contemplation on what they are sowing on the earth!
"When you seek Me with ALL your heart, YOU WILL BE FOUND BY ME." So the problem is a seeking problem. Too much self seeking, and not enough
God seeking. Men who are void of understanding can only be oppressors, they can't be reconcilers!
Usually when I get tempted to fret or worry and I start praying, the scripture comes to me....."let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. If you believe in God,
believe in my also. In my Father's house are many mansions, I go to prepare a place for you."
The desire of a mans heart is his kindness." It came to me that when our desire is selfish and ungodly, we will eventually be showing it by being mean. People get mean
when their selfish desires and interfered with. The fires of life take us either to destruction or to a place where IT'S OUR FOOD TO DO GOD'S WILL. We fall on the stone, or the stone falls on us.
There is another scripture in Pvb.24, 1 and 2 says, "Be not envious against evil men, neither desire to be with them. For their heart studieth destruction and their lips talk of mischief." I began thinking of the STUDY OF DESTRUCTION. Our hearts are always MEDITATING. Most people meditate on what they think is good for them, not
what IS THE GREATER CAUSE. The Psalmist prayed, "let the words of my mouth and the MEDITATION OF MY HEART, be acceptable in YOUR SIGHT." Our hearts are always studying, mediating. I began remembering back to how depressed I was when I lived with people who were overcome by their lusts, because their hearts studied....longed for worldliness, carnal comforts, etc. Most men are overcome by their lusts.....and the destructive forces in their lives.....because they spend
their lives studying the wrong thing. Loosing the bands of wickedness, undoing heavy burdens, freeing the opressed, giving food to the hungry, is not the sport they
want to play. Pleasing God is not their study.
My youngest daughter put it this way after she read Dante's version of Hell. You basically have the CONSUMERS and the PRODUCERS. Consumers are busy consuming and producers and busy producing. It made me think of a revelation I got yesterday reading Heb.5. I realized the first half of the chapter talks about those who God has raised up, who will care for the weak, poor, afflicted and those bound in chains. They pray for others and they get food from God to feed the hungry. They care about others, and they pray for others. They the last half is about those who scream for milk. They spend their lives looking for others to feed them, they only want to be given care,
they don't become care givers. Have you ever noticed in a room when there is one screaming baby, the baby screaming is OK? You put
another screaming baby in the same room, and the two babies can't handle it. I have come to see some of my friends like this. When they are being
babies, screaming for milk they can't stand being around other demanding babies. It's OK as long as they are the only one screaming, but when another one
comes in who is screaming for milk too.....they get totally offended. It's only OK if they are the ONLY screaming baby, and they hate it when they
have to deal with other screaming babies. Some of my friends have a hard time loving and forgiving one another, when they are living in the CONSUMING
self seeking mode.
I guess Is. 58 sums it all up in talking about the fast God has chosen. To lose the bands of wickedness, undo the heavy burden, set the oppressed
free, break the yoke. Those willing to intercede by speaking the truth in love to their brother inherit the blessings of God. Those who are self seeking,
and care about blessing their own life above all things never ride on the high places it talks about in Is.58.
If dying and going to heaven were like a big family reunion.....how would you fare? In this big family reunion.....there will be nothing hidden,
everything will be revealed with every secret thought. What we have hid in the dark will be shouted from the house tops.....and will the world have
seen Jesus really lives, BY THE WAY WE HAVE LOVED EACH OTHER.
At this family reunion we won't be able to have a hidden world of thoughts we didn't let Jesus into. It will be plain for all to see if we really
prayed TO BE REPAIRERS of the breeches, restorer's of paths to walk in. Were we like Job, "eyes to the blind, feet to the lame, and did we search out the
cause of things we know not? Did we really look to loose the bands of wickedness, and undo the heavy burdens, and to set each other free of
oppression, and to break the yoke of bondage we see one another bound by? It would be great if we all opened up our hidden little worlds of thoughts we have with each other, now before the big family reunion.....so we won't be ashamed. I'm not talking about dumping on each other things the devil whispers in our ears either. I'm talking about giving our talent. Not burying our gift. When we see things in each other we need to know if it's the accuser of the brethren talking to us, or if God wants to use us to
keep our brother or sister from falling into a ditch. When we don't let Jesus in to our secret world of thoughts and deeds, he will shout from the housetops
(the evil we have hid in our hearts), and reveal what we refused to deal with in life, at our death!
We don't need to be among those who work hard at making the outside of the cup clean.....but the inside is filled with accusations, imaginations, EVEN
TRUTH.....BUT that we were too slothful to divide the flesh from the spirit....for ourselves and one another. WHY DO WE SLEEP............and
grieve the Spirit of Christ in our soul? We know when others dirty their feet.........but we refuse to be foot washers. We know when others are
wearing grave clothes.......but we reject the fact that Jesus has called us to peel off each others rags. One day men, women, will be rewarded for what they have done, and REWARDED FOR WHAT THEY FAILED TO DO, OR WERE TOO SLOTHFUL TO DO.
It reminds me of something God had Gene bring up. It was in 1 John 5 that said something like, "If your brother sins and it's not a sin unto
death...and you have light to his sin, YOU CAN IMPART LIFE TO HIM WHERE HE IS DEAD IN HIS SIN! Jesus has given us such great power, but we don't tap into
it. That's what I got out of John 1 and 17. We should have a word anointing in our lives. We should HAVE THE WORDS OF JESUS for our problems, and we
can give one another the words that Jesus has given us. That's what Jesus did. He gave us the words of the Father....He gave us THE SPIRIT OF GLORY...LIGHT
AND LIFE....that comes through the spoken word. He sanctified himself unto the truth out of his great love for us, and gave us an example to follow.
Some of us are still ROCK COLLECTOR'S! We don't ask God for bread for one another, and the devil is right there to help us be stone collector's. When
it comes down to it...you can tell who loves the Father, by watching their fruit. Selfish people are mean, and they don't deal God's bread to the
hungry. And they raise selfish children who won't love and deal bread to the hungry either.
If we abide in His Spirit...we will get His words for one another. We won't let the little foxes live...we won't feed them until they are too fat to
deal with, we won't ignore them and pretend like they aren't there and that they won't do any damage. People who love Jesus, don't let the little foxes
live. They Judge them, and the things that divide, because THEY ARE WILLING TO FIGHT FOR THE UNITY OF FAITH....THE BOND OF PEACE. We need to be willing
to be peace makers, AND GOD GIVES THE MINISTRY OF RECONCILIATION TO ALL THOSE WHO LOVE WHO HE LOVES.....HIS CHILDREN! THESE WILL BE THE OVERCOMERS JESUS INVITES TO SIT DOWN AT HIS TABLE. Selfish, self indulgent men and women cannot be OVERCOMERS!
One day..........WHEN WE ARE AT THE BIG FAMILY REUNION, AFTER THIS LIFE.....we will see the great manifestation of Jesus'
words.........BLESSED ARE THE PEACEMAKERS.....FOR THEIRS IS THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN!
desires, and are overcome by them. A man full of faith, and self sacrifice who can find, they are rare. Most men WILL NOT DENY THEMSELVES, and pick up their cross and follow Jesus, so they live lives of self indulgence.
Most men are not faithful in relationships, not full of faith, not willing to do God's will in people's lives, so they are overcome by lust and worldliness by DEFAULT. They can't control their lusts and appetites for worldliness, because God gives His Spirit of self control TO THOSE WHO LOVE AND OBEY HIM, those who REALLY CARE for each other with more than lip service.
Many of the men I have known sacrifice relationships with wives, children, friends, and are overcome by their lusts or worldliness,
due to selfishness. Look what the bible says about JOB. "I was eyes to the blind, feet to the lame, THE CAUSE I KNEW NOT I SEARCHED OUT"
Many men live slothful lives, void of understanding. They are the greater cause in their lives, not the Lord, God's family, or even their own family.
They live life according to their selfish desires and self gratifications, without a whole lot of contemplation on what they are sowing on the earth!
"When you seek Me with ALL your heart, YOU WILL BE FOUND BY ME." So the problem is a seeking problem. Too much self seeking, and not enough
God seeking. Men who are void of understanding can only be oppressors, they can't be reconcilers!
Usually when I get tempted to fret or worry and I start praying, the scripture comes to me....."let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. If you believe in God,
believe in my also. In my Father's house are many mansions, I go to prepare a place for you."
The desire of a mans heart is his kindness." It came to me that when our desire is selfish and ungodly, we will eventually be showing it by being mean. People get mean
when their selfish desires and interfered with. The fires of life take us either to destruction or to a place where IT'S OUR FOOD TO DO GOD'S WILL. We fall on the stone, or the stone falls on us.
There is another scripture in Pvb.24, 1 and 2 says, "Be not envious against evil men, neither desire to be with them. For their heart studieth destruction and their lips talk of mischief." I began thinking of the STUDY OF DESTRUCTION. Our hearts are always MEDITATING. Most people meditate on what they think is good for them, not
what IS THE GREATER CAUSE. The Psalmist prayed, "let the words of my mouth and the MEDITATION OF MY HEART, be acceptable in YOUR SIGHT." Our hearts are always studying, mediating. I began remembering back to how depressed I was when I lived with people who were overcome by their lusts, because their hearts studied....longed for worldliness, carnal comforts, etc. Most men are overcome by their lusts.....and the destructive forces in their lives.....because they spend
their lives studying the wrong thing. Loosing the bands of wickedness, undoing heavy burdens, freeing the opressed, giving food to the hungry, is not the sport they
want to play. Pleasing God is not their study.
My youngest daughter put it this way after she read Dante's version of Hell. You basically have the CONSUMERS and the PRODUCERS. Consumers are busy consuming and producers and busy producing. It made me think of a revelation I got yesterday reading Heb.5. I realized the first half of the chapter talks about those who God has raised up, who will care for the weak, poor, afflicted and those bound in chains. They pray for others and they get food from God to feed the hungry. They care about others, and they pray for others. They the last half is about those who scream for milk. They spend their lives looking for others to feed them, they only want to be given care,
they don't become care givers. Have you ever noticed in a room when there is one screaming baby, the baby screaming is OK? You put
another screaming baby in the same room, and the two babies can't handle it. I have come to see some of my friends like this. When they are being
babies, screaming for milk they can't stand being around other demanding babies. It's OK as long as they are the only one screaming, but when another one
comes in who is screaming for milk too.....they get totally offended. It's only OK if they are the ONLY screaming baby, and they hate it when they
have to deal with other screaming babies. Some of my friends have a hard time loving and forgiving one another, when they are living in the CONSUMING
self seeking mode.
I guess Is. 58 sums it all up in talking about the fast God has chosen. To lose the bands of wickedness, undo the heavy burden, set the oppressed
free, break the yoke. Those willing to intercede by speaking the truth in love to their brother inherit the blessings of God. Those who are self seeking,
and care about blessing their own life above all things never ride on the high places it talks about in Is.58.
If dying and going to heaven were like a big family reunion.....how would you fare? In this big family reunion.....there will be nothing hidden,
everything will be revealed with every secret thought. What we have hid in the dark will be shouted from the house tops.....and will the world have
seen Jesus really lives, BY THE WAY WE HAVE LOVED EACH OTHER.
At this family reunion we won't be able to have a hidden world of thoughts we didn't let Jesus into. It will be plain for all to see if we really
prayed TO BE REPAIRERS of the breeches, restorer's of paths to walk in. Were we like Job, "eyes to the blind, feet to the lame, and did we search out the
cause of things we know not? Did we really look to loose the bands of wickedness, and undo the heavy burdens, and to set each other free of
oppression, and to break the yoke of bondage we see one another bound by? It would be great if we all opened up our hidden little worlds of thoughts we have with each other, now before the big family reunion.....so we won't be ashamed. I'm not talking about dumping on each other things the devil whispers in our ears either. I'm talking about giving our talent. Not burying our gift. When we see things in each other we need to know if it's the accuser of the brethren talking to us, or if God wants to use us to
keep our brother or sister from falling into a ditch. When we don't let Jesus in to our secret world of thoughts and deeds, he will shout from the housetops
(the evil we have hid in our hearts), and reveal what we refused to deal with in life, at our death!
We don't need to be among those who work hard at making the outside of the cup clean.....but the inside is filled with accusations, imaginations, EVEN
TRUTH.....BUT that we were too slothful to divide the flesh from the spirit....for ourselves and one another. WHY DO WE SLEEP............and
grieve the Spirit of Christ in our soul? We know when others dirty their feet.........but we refuse to be foot washers. We know when others are
wearing grave clothes.......but we reject the fact that Jesus has called us to peel off each others rags. One day men, women, will be rewarded for what they have done, and REWARDED FOR WHAT THEY FAILED TO DO, OR WERE TOO SLOTHFUL TO DO.
It reminds me of something God had Gene bring up. It was in 1 John 5 that said something like, "If your brother sins and it's not a sin unto
death...and you have light to his sin, YOU CAN IMPART LIFE TO HIM WHERE HE IS DEAD IN HIS SIN! Jesus has given us such great power, but we don't tap into
it. That's what I got out of John 1 and 17. We should have a word anointing in our lives. We should HAVE THE WORDS OF JESUS for our problems, and we
can give one another the words that Jesus has given us. That's what Jesus did. He gave us the words of the Father....He gave us THE SPIRIT OF GLORY...LIGHT
AND LIFE....that comes through the spoken word. He sanctified himself unto the truth out of his great love for us, and gave us an example to follow.
Some of us are still ROCK COLLECTOR'S! We don't ask God for bread for one another, and the devil is right there to help us be stone collector's. When
it comes down to it...you can tell who loves the Father, by watching their fruit. Selfish people are mean, and they don't deal God's bread to the
hungry. And they raise selfish children who won't love and deal bread to the hungry either.
If we abide in His Spirit...we will get His words for one another. We won't let the little foxes live...we won't feed them until they are too fat to
deal with, we won't ignore them and pretend like they aren't there and that they won't do any damage. People who love Jesus, don't let the little foxes
live. They Judge them, and the things that divide, because THEY ARE WILLING TO FIGHT FOR THE UNITY OF FAITH....THE BOND OF PEACE. We need to be willing
to be peace makers, AND GOD GIVES THE MINISTRY OF RECONCILIATION TO ALL THOSE WHO LOVE WHO HE LOVES.....HIS CHILDREN! THESE WILL BE THE OVERCOMERS JESUS INVITES TO SIT DOWN AT HIS TABLE. Selfish, self indulgent men and women cannot be OVERCOMERS!
One day..........WHEN WE ARE AT THE BIG FAMILY REUNION, AFTER THIS LIFE.....we will see the great manifestation of Jesus'
words.........BLESSED ARE THE PEACEMAKERS.....FOR THEIRS IS THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN!
A TWIG MINISTRY................
A TWIG MINISTRY................
Jesus said..... "first take the log out of your eye so you can see clearly
to remove the speck out of your brother's eye." We should all have a
"twig" ministry. And if we get offended with our brother or sister,
bitter, critical, unforgiving, it's a symptom of never removing the log out
of our own eye. I think that's why Jesus also said, if you don't
forgive, Your Father in heaven won't forgive you.
We bind our sins to us when we refuse to forgive others. In Ez. 3 it talks
about showing others the twig in their eye. Those who want to be Holy before a
Holy God, will thank God for eternity for someone who came into their lives who
reflected anything they might be doing that would be an offense to the God they
say they love and serve. They love reproof and correction and see it as a
blessing not a curse! If we are "self-righteous" we will hate anyone
who dare reprove us.
I got a revelation the other night while praying..... Heaven will be full
women (in my case I'm a woman), who NEEDED A SAVIOUR, and turned to JESUS
CHRIST to wash away their sin. In turn they became SO THANKFUL, they became
righteous, BECAUSE THEY LOVED JESUS SO MUCH FOR freeing them from their
wretched, naked, poor, miserable selves! Change is easy for those who love.
And women who have been forgiven much, LOVE MUCH.
Then you have the women who accuse others and excuse themselves. They
don't go to their brother when they are offended with a loving, forgiving,
understanding spirit. They can't feed others what God has shown them about
their own sin, for they haven't looked at their sin. And those who HATE to
look at their sin, will Hate anyone who comes to them even about their
"twig", and who is willing to talk to them about the log they once had
in their eye. They don't care if someone comes to them humble, and
forgiving with understanding because they don't care if they have offended
God. They don't want to look at their sin, their log.
In Lev. 19:17 it actually says if you don't go to others when they have
offended you, YOU WILL LOOK DOWN ON THEM IN YOUR HEART AND YOU WILL INCUR SIN
BECAUSE OF IT.
In Jer. 3 it says if you don't reflect to others their sin, YOU WILL BE
HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR THEIR SIN TOO. It also says in Jer.23 that TRUE shepherds
will turn God's people from their sin. False Shepherd tell the sheep they
are ok in their sin. And Rev.3 talks about who Jesus really is...... HE SHOWS
US OUR FAULTS, our sins. The Holy Ghost job is "the spirit of
judgment", to comfort, heal, direct, He's the SPIRIT OF TRUTH, not the
spirit of flattery, pretense and deceit.
People who are serving themselves and not the Lord, don't want to get
involved with the "washing of the feet of others." They also
don't have a care for removing any grave clothes. They don't pray, they
don't look for Jesus to help them with others to feed them the word of
God....... "He sent His word and healed them and delivered them from all
their destructions." They don't really believe in God or His word, so
they can't give it freely knowing God will do the rest.
Proverbs 31 talks about wise women who get their bread from afar. These are
the women who love God, who pray for others out of sincere love for God and
others, who get "food" for their children and God's children.
These are the ones with "oil" in their lamp.
Their is a principal that Gene gave Michael Davis one time. Jesus said,
"agree with your adversary quickly while you are in the way with him, lest
you be cast into prison, and pay to the last penny." He already was in
prison, but he was a man who always had to get "caught" in sin. He
wouldn't judge himself, so he was always judged. And fighting against the
truth put him in spiritual prison too.
That's why Jesus told us to judge ourselves. Gene calls this "damage
control" Christianity. Wait until your caught then deal with things. But
you live to clean up your mess, rather than take on true change. I can have
confidence that when I speak God's word in love and faith to someone and
they choose to reject it, they are headed for spiritual prison. It has nothing
to do with me and everything to do with God. What I have seen sadly to say is,
some women love to live in prison. They are like real prisoners. They are
prisoners of their sin. They are told what to do, where to go, they get their 3
square meals and they are as addicted to their prison as someone who keeps
getting locked up due to being familiar with it. A life of taking and usury,
all in the name of Christianity. A wasted life, fruitless, only seeking their
own comfort and gain, hoping their "salvation" ticket will get them in
those pearly gates! Many people in prison are sorry for how they have messed up
their lives, but they have never been sorry for how they affected God and His
Kingdom, or His Children. It's a selfish sorrow they have, not a godly
sorrow.
I wonder if it's "hell insurance" Christianity. All about what
Jesus can do for me, nothing to do with DOING HIS WILL. So many Christians
think they can escape, looking to get, take, have, and be benefactors in
God's kingdom, all the while caring very little if they are living to please
Him or do His will. That should be what "feeds" us, to do His will,
just like it fed Jesus!
Just like I said when I spoke in a church yesterday, " I know the Lord
knows what I think about others and He will reward me according to what I did
about what I thought about others." Many people never even get to that
place. They have hope and faith that the Lord doesn't know what they are
thinking about others, and He won't care about what they did about what they
thought. I was revealing what I thought about a Pastor's wife I had just
met. I said, "I believe Jesus' words, what we do in the dark will be
shouted from the housetops. What we hide will be revealed one day. So many
people don't even believe that." I didn't either until Gene came
into my life.
I realized we (some of the women I have known for years) have a strength. We
go after the little foxes, divisions, schisms, evil imaginations, and there is a
unity we have that most Christian groups don't really have. Ps.133 says,
"Oh how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity, that's
where the anointing is, that's where the Lord commands the blessing.
That's the kind of marriage I have, an anointed, blessed marriage because
Gene and I know who the "accuser of the brethren is". The one who
divides us, so we go after the little foxes, divisions, schisms, evil
imaginations that come our way. We pray for and hear from God for our problems
with each other, and "wisdom is seen in her children." Our blood
children and spiritual children are catching on, and having more and more
anointed and blessed lives due to that! They are getting to the place they care
more about doing God's will than pleasing themselves. They are turning from
pleasing themselves by not shutting their eyes and hearts to each other.......
being indifferent. If you want what I wrote about indifference and what a sin
it is, please let me know. Most of us came from indifferent families...........
and their was a "famine in the land for the word of the Lord."
Jesus said..... "first take the log out of your eye so you can see clearly
to remove the speck out of your brother's eye." We should all have a
"twig" ministry. And if we get offended with our brother or sister,
bitter, critical, unforgiving, it's a symptom of never removing the log out
of our own eye. I think that's why Jesus also said, if you don't
forgive, Your Father in heaven won't forgive you.
We bind our sins to us when we refuse to forgive others. In Ez. 3 it talks
about showing others the twig in their eye. Those who want to be Holy before a
Holy God, will thank God for eternity for someone who came into their lives who
reflected anything they might be doing that would be an offense to the God they
say they love and serve. They love reproof and correction and see it as a
blessing not a curse! If we are "self-righteous" we will hate anyone
who dare reprove us.
I got a revelation the other night while praying..... Heaven will be full
women (in my case I'm a woman), who NEEDED A SAVIOUR, and turned to JESUS
CHRIST to wash away their sin. In turn they became SO THANKFUL, they became
righteous, BECAUSE THEY LOVED JESUS SO MUCH FOR freeing them from their
wretched, naked, poor, miserable selves! Change is easy for those who love.
And women who have been forgiven much, LOVE MUCH.
Then you have the women who accuse others and excuse themselves. They
don't go to their brother when they are offended with a loving, forgiving,
understanding spirit. They can't feed others what God has shown them about
their own sin, for they haven't looked at their sin. And those who HATE to
look at their sin, will Hate anyone who comes to them even about their
"twig", and who is willing to talk to them about the log they once had
in their eye. They don't care if someone comes to them humble, and
forgiving with understanding because they don't care if they have offended
God. They don't want to look at their sin, their log.
In Lev. 19:17 it actually says if you don't go to others when they have
offended you, YOU WILL LOOK DOWN ON THEM IN YOUR HEART AND YOU WILL INCUR SIN
BECAUSE OF IT.
In Jer. 3 it says if you don't reflect to others their sin, YOU WILL BE
HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR THEIR SIN TOO. It also says in Jer.23 that TRUE shepherds
will turn God's people from their sin. False Shepherd tell the sheep they
are ok in their sin. And Rev.3 talks about who Jesus really is...... HE SHOWS
US OUR FAULTS, our sins. The Holy Ghost job is "the spirit of
judgment", to comfort, heal, direct, He's the SPIRIT OF TRUTH, not the
spirit of flattery, pretense and deceit.
People who are serving themselves and not the Lord, don't want to get
involved with the "washing of the feet of others." They also
don't have a care for removing any grave clothes. They don't pray, they
don't look for Jesus to help them with others to feed them the word of
God....... "He sent His word and healed them and delivered them from all
their destructions." They don't really believe in God or His word, so
they can't give it freely knowing God will do the rest.
Proverbs 31 talks about wise women who get their bread from afar. These are
the women who love God, who pray for others out of sincere love for God and
others, who get "food" for their children and God's children.
These are the ones with "oil" in their lamp.
Their is a principal that Gene gave Michael Davis one time. Jesus said,
"agree with your adversary quickly while you are in the way with him, lest
you be cast into prison, and pay to the last penny." He already was in
prison, but he was a man who always had to get "caught" in sin. He
wouldn't judge himself, so he was always judged. And fighting against the
truth put him in spiritual prison too.
That's why Jesus told us to judge ourselves. Gene calls this "damage
control" Christianity. Wait until your caught then deal with things. But
you live to clean up your mess, rather than take on true change. I can have
confidence that when I speak God's word in love and faith to someone and
they choose to reject it, they are headed for spiritual prison. It has nothing
to do with me and everything to do with God. What I have seen sadly to say is,
some women love to live in prison. They are like real prisoners. They are
prisoners of their sin. They are told what to do, where to go, they get their 3
square meals and they are as addicted to their prison as someone who keeps
getting locked up due to being familiar with it. A life of taking and usury,
all in the name of Christianity. A wasted life, fruitless, only seeking their
own comfort and gain, hoping their "salvation" ticket will get them in
those pearly gates! Many people in prison are sorry for how they have messed up
their lives, but they have never been sorry for how they affected God and His
Kingdom, or His Children. It's a selfish sorrow they have, not a godly
sorrow.
I wonder if it's "hell insurance" Christianity. All about what
Jesus can do for me, nothing to do with DOING HIS WILL. So many Christians
think they can escape, looking to get, take, have, and be benefactors in
God's kingdom, all the while caring very little if they are living to please
Him or do His will. That should be what "feeds" us, to do His will,
just like it fed Jesus!
Just like I said when I spoke in a church yesterday, " I know the Lord
knows what I think about others and He will reward me according to what I did
about what I thought about others." Many people never even get to that
place. They have hope and faith that the Lord doesn't know what they are
thinking about others, and He won't care about what they did about what they
thought. I was revealing what I thought about a Pastor's wife I had just
met. I said, "I believe Jesus' words, what we do in the dark will be
shouted from the housetops. What we hide will be revealed one day. So many
people don't even believe that." I didn't either until Gene came
into my life.
I realized we (some of the women I have known for years) have a strength. We
go after the little foxes, divisions, schisms, evil imaginations, and there is a
unity we have that most Christian groups don't really have. Ps.133 says,
"Oh how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity, that's
where the anointing is, that's where the Lord commands the blessing.
That's the kind of marriage I have, an anointed, blessed marriage because
Gene and I know who the "accuser of the brethren is". The one who
divides us, so we go after the little foxes, divisions, schisms, evil
imaginations that come our way. We pray for and hear from God for our problems
with each other, and "wisdom is seen in her children." Our blood
children and spiritual children are catching on, and having more and more
anointed and blessed lives due to that! They are getting to the place they care
more about doing God's will than pleasing themselves. They are turning from
pleasing themselves by not shutting their eyes and hearts to each other.......
being indifferent. If you want what I wrote about indifference and what a sin
it is, please let me know. Most of us came from indifferent families...........
and their was a "famine in the land for the word of the Lord."
LYING
Proverbs 26:28
A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin.
GOD KNOWS WHO'S LYING: 2 Corinthians 11:31
The God and Father of the Lord Jesus, who is to be praised forever, knows that I am not lying.
Jeremiah 23:26
How long will this continue in the hearts of these lying prophets, who prophesy the delusions of their own minds?
Ezekiel 13:19
You have profaned me among my people for a few handfuls of barley and scraps of bread. By lying to my people, who listen to lies, you have killed those who should not have died and have spared those who should not live.
Hosea 4:2
There is only cursing, [ That is, to pronounce a curse upon ] lying and murder, stealing and adultery; they break all bounds, and bloodshed follows bloodshed.
Psalm 4:2
O you sons of men, how long will you turn my honor and glory into
shame? How long will you love vanity and futility and seek after
lies? Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!
Psalm 4:1-3 (in Context) Psalm 4 (Whole Chapter)
Psalm 5:6
You will destroy those who speak lies; the Lord abhors [and rejects]
the bloodthirsty and deceitful man.
Psalm 5:5-7 (in Context) Psalm 5 (Whole Chapter)
Psalm 7:14
Behold, [the wicked man] conceives iniquity and is pregnant with
mischief and gives birth to lies.
Psalm 7:13-15 (in Context) Psalm 7
Psalm 58:3
The ungodly are perverse and estranged from the womb; they go astray
as soon as they are born, speaking lies.
Psalm 58:2-4 (in Context) Psalm 58 (Whole Chapter)
Psalm 59:7
Behold, they belch out [insults] with their mouths; swords [of
sarcasm, ridicule, slander, and lies] are in their lips, for who,
they think, hears us?
Psalm 59:6-8 (in Context) Psalm 59 (Whole Chapter)
Psalm 62:4
They only consult to cast him down from his height [to dishonor him];
they delight in lies. They bless with their mouths, but they curse
inwardly
Psalm 101:7
He who works deceit shall not dwell in my house; he who tells lies
shall not continue in my presence.
Psalm 101:6-8 (in Context) Psalm 101 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 6:19
A false witness who breathes out lies [even under oath], and he who
sows discord among his brethren.
Proverbs 6:18-20 (in Context) Proverbs 6 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 14:25
A truthful witness saves lives, but a deceitful witness speaks lies
[and endangers lives].
Proverbs 14:24-26 (in Context) Proverbs 14 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 19:5
A false witness shall not be unpunished, and he who breathes out lies
shall not escape. [Exod 23:1; Deut 19:16-19; Prov 6:19; 21:28 ]
Proverbs 19:4-6 (in Context) Proverbs 19 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 19:9
A false witness shall not be unpunished, and he who breathes forth
lies shall perish
Proverbs 23:28
She also lies in wait as a robber or as one waits for prey, and she
increases the treacherous among men.
Ecclesiastes 8:6
For every purpose and matter has its [right] time and judgment,
although the misery and wickedness of man lies heavily upon him [who
rebels against the king].
Isaiah 59:3
For your hands are defiled with blood and your fingers with iniquity;
your lips have spoken lies, your tongue mutters wickedness.
Isaiah 59:4
None sues or calls in righteousness [but for the sake of doing injury
to others--to take some undue advantage]; no one goes to law honestly
and pleads [his case] in truth; they trust in emptiness,
worthlessness and futility, and speaking lies! They conceive mischief
and bring forth evil!
Isaiah 59:3-5 (in Context) Isaiah 59 (Whole Chapter)
Jeremiah 9:3
And they bend their tongue, [which is] their bow for the lies [they
shoot]. And not according to faithfulness do they rule and become
strong in the land; for they proceed from evil to evil, and they do
not know and understand and acknowledge Me, says the Lord.
Jeremiah 9:2-4 (in Context) Jeremiah 9 (Whole Chapter)
Jeremiah 9:5
And they deceive and mock every one his neighbor and do not speak the
truth. They have taught their tongues to speak lies; they weary
themselves committing iniquity
Jeremiah 16:19
[Then said Jeremiah] O Lord, my Strength and my Stronghold, and my
Refuge in the day of affliction, to You shall the nations come from
the ends of the earth and shall say, Surely our fathers have
inherited nothing but lies, emptiness, and futility, worthless things
in which there is no profit!
Jeremiah 16:18-20 (in Context) Jeremiah 16 (Whole Chapter)
Jeremiah 23:14
I have seen also in the prophets of Jerusalem a horrible thing: they
commit adultery and walk in lies; they encourage and strengthen the
hands of evildoers, so that none returns from his wickedness. They
have all of them become to Me like Sodom, and her inhabitants like
Gomorrah
Ezekiel 13:8
Therefore thus says the Lord God: Because you have spoken empty,
false, and delusive words and have seen lies, therefore behold, I am
against you, says the Lord God.
Ezekiel 13:7-9 (in Context) Ezekiel 13 (Whole Chapter)
Ezekiel 13:19
You have profaned Me among My people [in payment] for handfuls of
barley and for pieces of bread, slaying persons who should not die
and giving [a guaranty of] life to those who should not live, by your
lying to My people, who give heed to lies.
Ezekiel 13:18-20
Ezekiel 13:22
Because with lies you have made the righteous sad and disheartened,
whom I have not made sad or disheartened, and because you have
encouraged and strengthened the hands of the wicked, that he should
not return from his wicked way and be saved [in that you falsely
promised him life],
Ezekiel 13:21-23
Daniel 11:27
And as for both of these kings, their hearts and minds shall be set
on doing mischief; they shall speak lies over the same table, but it
will not succeed, for the end is yet to be at the time appointed.
Daniel 11:26-28 (in Context) Daniel 11 (Whole Chapter)
Hosea 7:3
They make the king glad with their wickedness, and the princes with
their lies.
Hosea 7:2-4 (in Context) Hosea 7 (Whole Chapter)
Hosea 7:13
Woe to them, for they have wandered from Me! Destruction to them,
because they have rebelled and trespassed against Me! Though I would
redeem them, yet they have spoken lies against Me.
Hosea 7:12-14
Hosea 10:13
You have plowed and plotted wickedness, you have reaped the [willful]
injustice [of oppressors], you have eaten the fruit of lies. Because
you have trusted in your [own] way and your chariots, in the
multitude of your mighty men,
Hosea 10:12-14 (in Context) Hosea 10 (Whole Chapter)
Hosea 11:12
Ephraim surrounds Me with lies and the house of Israel with deceit,
and Judah is not yet steadfast with God, with the faithful Holy One.
Hosea 11:11-13 (in Context) Hosea 11 (Whole Chapter)
Hosea 12:1
EPHRAIM HERDS and feeds on the wind and pursues the [parching] east
wind; every day he increases lies and violence, and a covenant is
made with Assyria and oil is carried to Egypt. [Isa 30:6, 7 ]
Hosea 12:1-3 (in Context) Hosea 12 (Whole Chapter)
Amos 2:4
Thus says the Lord: For three transgressions of Judah and for four
[for multiplied delinquencies], I will not reverse the punishment of
it or revoke My word concerning it, because they have despised and
rejected the law of the Lord and have not kept His commandments, but
their lies, after which their fathers have walked, caused them to err
and go astray.
Zephaniah 3:13
What is left of Israel shall not do iniquity or speak lies, neither
shall a deceitful tongue be found in their mouth, for they shall feed
and lie down and none shall make them afraid
John 8:44
You are of your father, the devil, and it is your will to practice
the lusts and gratify the desires [which are characteristic] of your
father. He was a murderer from the beginning and does not stand in
the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a
falsehood, he speaks what is natural to him, for he is a liar
[himself] and the father of lies and of all that is false.
A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin.
GOD KNOWS WHO'S LYING: 2 Corinthians 11:31
The God and Father of the Lord Jesus, who is to be praised forever, knows that I am not lying.
Jeremiah 23:26
How long will this continue in the hearts of these lying prophets, who prophesy the delusions of their own minds?
Ezekiel 13:19
You have profaned me among my people for a few handfuls of barley and scraps of bread. By lying to my people, who listen to lies, you have killed those who should not have died and have spared those who should not live.
Hosea 4:2
There is only cursing, [ That is, to pronounce a curse upon ] lying and murder, stealing and adultery; they break all bounds, and bloodshed follows bloodshed.
Psalm 4:2
O you sons of men, how long will you turn my honor and glory into
shame? How long will you love vanity and futility and seek after
lies? Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!
Psalm 4:1-3 (in Context) Psalm 4 (Whole Chapter)
Psalm 5:6
You will destroy those who speak lies; the Lord abhors [and rejects]
the bloodthirsty and deceitful man.
Psalm 5:5-7 (in Context) Psalm 5 (Whole Chapter)
Psalm 7:14
Behold, [the wicked man] conceives iniquity and is pregnant with
mischief and gives birth to lies.
Psalm 7:13-15 (in Context) Psalm 7
Psalm 58:3
The ungodly are perverse and estranged from the womb; they go astray
as soon as they are born, speaking lies.
Psalm 58:2-4 (in Context) Psalm 58 (Whole Chapter)
Psalm 59:7
Behold, they belch out [insults] with their mouths; swords [of
sarcasm, ridicule, slander, and lies] are in their lips, for who,
they think, hears us?
Psalm 59:6-8 (in Context) Psalm 59 (Whole Chapter)
Psalm 62:4
They only consult to cast him down from his height [to dishonor him];
they delight in lies. They bless with their mouths, but they curse
inwardly
Psalm 101:7
He who works deceit shall not dwell in my house; he who tells lies
shall not continue in my presence.
Psalm 101:6-8 (in Context) Psalm 101 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 6:19
A false witness who breathes out lies [even under oath], and he who
sows discord among his brethren.
Proverbs 6:18-20 (in Context) Proverbs 6 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 14:25
A truthful witness saves lives, but a deceitful witness speaks lies
[and endangers lives].
Proverbs 14:24-26 (in Context) Proverbs 14 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 19:5
A false witness shall not be unpunished, and he who breathes out lies
shall not escape. [Exod 23:1; Deut 19:16-19; Prov 6:19; 21:28 ]
Proverbs 19:4-6 (in Context) Proverbs 19 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 19:9
A false witness shall not be unpunished, and he who breathes forth
lies shall perish
Proverbs 23:28
She also lies in wait as a robber or as one waits for prey, and she
increases the treacherous among men.
Ecclesiastes 8:6
For every purpose and matter has its [right] time and judgment,
although the misery and wickedness of man lies heavily upon him [who
rebels against the king].
Isaiah 59:3
For your hands are defiled with blood and your fingers with iniquity;
your lips have spoken lies, your tongue mutters wickedness.
Isaiah 59:4
None sues or calls in righteousness [but for the sake of doing injury
to others--to take some undue advantage]; no one goes to law honestly
and pleads [his case] in truth; they trust in emptiness,
worthlessness and futility, and speaking lies! They conceive mischief
and bring forth evil!
Isaiah 59:3-5 (in Context) Isaiah 59 (Whole Chapter)
Jeremiah 9:3
And they bend their tongue, [which is] their bow for the lies [they
shoot]. And not according to faithfulness do they rule and become
strong in the land; for they proceed from evil to evil, and they do
not know and understand and acknowledge Me, says the Lord.
Jeremiah 9:2-4 (in Context) Jeremiah 9 (Whole Chapter)
Jeremiah 9:5
And they deceive and mock every one his neighbor and do not speak the
truth. They have taught their tongues to speak lies; they weary
themselves committing iniquity
Jeremiah 16:19
[Then said Jeremiah] O Lord, my Strength and my Stronghold, and my
Refuge in the day of affliction, to You shall the nations come from
the ends of the earth and shall say, Surely our fathers have
inherited nothing but lies, emptiness, and futility, worthless things
in which there is no profit!
Jeremiah 16:18-20 (in Context) Jeremiah 16 (Whole Chapter)
Jeremiah 23:14
I have seen also in the prophets of Jerusalem a horrible thing: they
commit adultery and walk in lies; they encourage and strengthen the
hands of evildoers, so that none returns from his wickedness. They
have all of them become to Me like Sodom, and her inhabitants like
Gomorrah
Ezekiel 13:8
Therefore thus says the Lord God: Because you have spoken empty,
false, and delusive words and have seen lies, therefore behold, I am
against you, says the Lord God.
Ezekiel 13:7-9 (in Context) Ezekiel 13 (Whole Chapter)
Ezekiel 13:19
You have profaned Me among My people [in payment] for handfuls of
barley and for pieces of bread, slaying persons who should not die
and giving [a guaranty of] life to those who should not live, by your
lying to My people, who give heed to lies.
Ezekiel 13:18-20
Ezekiel 13:22
Because with lies you have made the righteous sad and disheartened,
whom I have not made sad or disheartened, and because you have
encouraged and strengthened the hands of the wicked, that he should
not return from his wicked way and be saved [in that you falsely
promised him life],
Ezekiel 13:21-23
Daniel 11:27
And as for both of these kings, their hearts and minds shall be set
on doing mischief; they shall speak lies over the same table, but it
will not succeed, for the end is yet to be at the time appointed.
Daniel 11:26-28 (in Context) Daniel 11 (Whole Chapter)
Hosea 7:3
They make the king glad with their wickedness, and the princes with
their lies.
Hosea 7:2-4 (in Context) Hosea 7 (Whole Chapter)
Hosea 7:13
Woe to them, for they have wandered from Me! Destruction to them,
because they have rebelled and trespassed against Me! Though I would
redeem them, yet they have spoken lies against Me.
Hosea 7:12-14
Hosea 10:13
You have plowed and plotted wickedness, you have reaped the [willful]
injustice [of oppressors], you have eaten the fruit of lies. Because
you have trusted in your [own] way and your chariots, in the
multitude of your mighty men,
Hosea 10:12-14 (in Context) Hosea 10 (Whole Chapter)
Hosea 11:12
Ephraim surrounds Me with lies and the house of Israel with deceit,
and Judah is not yet steadfast with God, with the faithful Holy One.
Hosea 11:11-13 (in Context) Hosea 11 (Whole Chapter)
Hosea 12:1
EPHRAIM HERDS and feeds on the wind and pursues the [parching] east
wind; every day he increases lies and violence, and a covenant is
made with Assyria and oil is carried to Egypt. [Isa 30:6, 7 ]
Hosea 12:1-3 (in Context) Hosea 12 (Whole Chapter)
Amos 2:4
Thus says the Lord: For three transgressions of Judah and for four
[for multiplied delinquencies], I will not reverse the punishment of
it or revoke My word concerning it, because they have despised and
rejected the law of the Lord and have not kept His commandments, but
their lies, after which their fathers have walked, caused them to err
and go astray.
Zephaniah 3:13
What is left of Israel shall not do iniquity or speak lies, neither
shall a deceitful tongue be found in their mouth, for they shall feed
and lie down and none shall make them afraid
John 8:44
You are of your father, the devil, and it is your will to practice
the lusts and gratify the desires [which are characteristic] of your
father. He was a murderer from the beginning and does not stand in
the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a
falsehood, he speaks what is natural to him, for he is a liar
[himself] and the father of lies and of all that is false.
Friday, February 13, 2009
good ones on integrity
Proverbs 11:3 The integrity of the upright will guide them, But ... ... The integrity of the upright will guide them, But the crookedness of the ... Integrity
guides decent people, but hypocrisy leads treacherous people to ruin. ...
biblecc.com/proverbs/11-3.htm - 12k
Proverbs 10:9 He who walks in integrity walks securely, But he who ... He who walks in integrity walks securely, But he who perverts ... He that walketh in
integrity walketh securely; but he that perverteth his ways shall be known. ...
biblecc.com/proverbs/10-9.htm - 12k
[ More results from biblecc.com/proverbs ]
Psalm 25:21 Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, For I wait ... ... Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, For I wait for You. ... Integrity
and honesty will protect me because I wait for you. ...
biblecc.com/psalms/25-21.htm - 12k
Psalm 15:2 He who walks with integrity, and works righteousness ... ... He who walks with integrity, and works ... [A psalm by David.] The one who walks with
integrity, does what is righteous, and speaks the truth within his heart. ...
biblecc.com/psalms/15-2.htm - 12k
[ More results from biblecc.com/psalms ]
Job 2:3 The LORD said to Satan, "Have you considered My servant ... and turning away from evil. And he still holds fast his integrity, although
you incited Me against him to ruin him without cause ...
biblecc.com/job/2-3.htm - 15k
Job 2:9 Then his wife said to him, "Do you still hold ... Then his wife said to him, "Do you still hold fast your integrity? ...
biblecc.com/job/2-9.htm - 12k
[ More results from biblecc.com/job ]
Genesis 20:5 "Did he not himself say to me, 'She is my ... my sister '? And she herself said, 'He is my brother.' In the integrity
of my heart and the innocence of my hands I have done this ...
biblecc.com/genesis/20-5.htm - 13k
Genesis 20:6 Then God said to him in the dream, "Yes, I ... Then God said to him in the dream, "Yes, I know that in the integrity of your ...
biblecc.com/genesis/20-6.htm - 14k
[ More results from biblecc.com/genesis ]
1 Kings 9:4 "As for you, if you will walk before Me as ... As for you, if you will walk before Me as your father David walked, in integrity
of heart and uprightness, doing according to all that I have commanded you and ...
biblecc.com/1_kings/9-4.htm - 14k
Titus 2:7 In all things show yourself to be an example of ... Teach with integrity and dignity. .... ... In ..... integrity ..... ...
biblecc.com/titus/2-7.htm - 13k
Judges 9:19 If then you have dealt in truth and integrity with ... if then you have dealt in truth and integrity with Jerubbaal and his house this
day, rejoice in Abimelech, and let him also rejoice in you. ...
biblecc.com/judges/9-19.htm - 13k
Judges 9:16 "Now therefore, if you have dealt in truth and ... ... "Now therefore, if you have dealt in truth and integrity in making ...
if ..... in ..... integrity ..... Jerubbaal ..... ...
biblecc.com/judges/9-16.htm - 14k
2 Peter 1:5 Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence ... ... Because of this, make every effort to add integrity to
your faith; and to integrity add knowledge ...
biblecc.com/2_peter/1-5.htm - 13k
2 Peter 1:3 Seeing that His divine power has granted to us ... ... for life and for godliness. This power was given to us through knowledge
of the one who called us by his own glory and integrity. ...
biblecc.com/2_peter/1-3.htm - 14k
[ More results from biblecc.com/2_peter ]
Amos 5:10 They hate him who reproves in the gate, And they ... They hate him who reproves in the gate, And they abhor him who speaks
with integrity. ... in ..... integrity ..... one ..... ...
biblecc.com/amos/5-10.htm - 12k
1 Chronicles 29:17 "Since I know, O my God, that You try the ... "Since I know, O my God, that You try the heart and delight in uprightness,
I, in the integrity of my heart ... integrity ..... intent ..... ...
biblecc.com/1_chronicles/29-17.htm - 15k
Galatians 2:5 But we did not yield in subjection to them for ... But not for an hour did we give way and submit to them; in order that
the Good News might continue with you in its integrity. ...
biblecc.com/galatians/2-5.htm - 13k
Nehemiah 7:2 Then I put Hanani my brother, and Hananiah the ... ... Hananiah ..... he ..... I ..... in ..... integrity ..... Jerusalem ..... man ..... ...
biblecc.com/nehemiah/7-2.htm - 13k
2 Timothy 2:22 Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue ... ... Keep a strong curb, however, on your youthful cravings; and strive for integrity,
good faith, love, peace, in company with all who pray to the Lord with pure ...
biblecc.com/2_timothy/2-22.htm - 14k
2 Corinthians 8:21 For we have regard for what is honorable, not ... ... For we seek not only God's approval of our integrity, but man's also. ...
biblecc.com/2_corinthians/8-21.htm - 13k
Revelation 19:11 And I saw heaven opened, and behold, a white ... ... I saw heaven standing open. There was a white horse, and its rider is named
Faithful and True. With integrity he judges and wages war. ...
biblecc.com/revelation/19-11.htm - 14k
Joshua 24:14 "Now, therefore, fear the LORD and serve Him in ... ... "Fear the LORD, and serve him with integrity and faithfulness. ...
biblecc.com/joshua/24-14.htm - 13k
Deuteronomy 18:13 "You shall be blameless before the LORD your God ... ... You must have integrity [in dealing] with the LORD your God. ...
biblecc.com/deuteronomy/18-13.htm - 11k
Deuteronomy 9:5 "It is not for your righteousness or for the ... ... he ..... heart ..... in ..... integrity ..... is ..... Isaac ..... It ..... ...
biblecc.com/deuteronomy/9-5.htm - 15k
Isaiah 59:4 No one sues righteously and no one pleads honestly. ... ... his ..... honestly ..... in ..... iniquity .....
integrity ..... justice ..... lies ..... ...
biblecc.com/isaiah/59-4.htm - 13k
Isaiah 45:23 "I have sworn by Myself, The word has gone forth ... has ..... have ..... I ..... in ..... integrity ..... knee ..... me ..... ...
biblecc.com/isaiah/45-23.htm - 13k
Matthew 22:16 And they sent their disciples to Him, along with the ... Herodians ..... him ..... in ..... integrity ..... know ..... man ..... men ..... ...
biblecc.com/matthew/22-16.htm - 15k
Mark 12:14 They came and said to Him, "Teacher, we know that ... God ..... him ..... in ..... integrity ..... Is ..... it ..... know ..... ...
biblecc.com/mark/12-14.htm - 16k
guides decent people, but hypocrisy leads treacherous people to ruin. ...
biblecc.com/proverbs/11-3.htm - 12k
Proverbs 10:9 He who walks in integrity walks securely, But he who ... He who walks in integrity walks securely, But he who perverts ... He that walketh in
integrity walketh securely; but he that perverteth his ways shall be known. ...
biblecc.com/proverbs/10-9.htm - 12k
[ More results from biblecc.com/proverbs ]
Psalm 25:21 Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, For I wait ... ... Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, For I wait for You. ... Integrity
and honesty will protect me because I wait for you. ...
biblecc.com/psalms/25-21.htm - 12k
Psalm 15:2 He who walks with integrity, and works righteousness ... ... He who walks with integrity, and works ... [A psalm by David.] The one who walks with
integrity, does what is righteous, and speaks the truth within his heart. ...
biblecc.com/psalms/15-2.htm - 12k
[ More results from biblecc.com/psalms ]
Job 2:3 The LORD said to Satan, "Have you considered My servant ... and turning away from evil. And he still holds fast his integrity, although
you incited Me against him to ruin him without cause ...
biblecc.com/job/2-3.htm - 15k
Job 2:9 Then his wife said to him, "Do you still hold ... Then his wife said to him, "Do you still hold fast your integrity? ...
biblecc.com/job/2-9.htm - 12k
[ More results from biblecc.com/job ]
Genesis 20:5 "Did he not himself say to me, 'She is my ... my sister '? And she herself said, 'He is my brother.' In the integrity
of my heart and the innocence of my hands I have done this ...
biblecc.com/genesis/20-5.htm - 13k
Genesis 20:6 Then God said to him in the dream, "Yes, I ... Then God said to him in the dream, "Yes, I know that in the integrity of your ...
biblecc.com/genesis/20-6.htm - 14k
[ More results from biblecc.com/genesis ]
1 Kings 9:4 "As for you, if you will walk before Me as ... As for you, if you will walk before Me as your father David walked, in integrity
of heart and uprightness, doing according to all that I have commanded you and ...
biblecc.com/1_kings/9-4.htm - 14k
Titus 2:7 In all things show yourself to be an example of ... Teach with integrity and dignity. .... ... In ..... integrity ..... ...
biblecc.com/titus/2-7.htm - 13k
Judges 9:19 If then you have dealt in truth and integrity with ... if then you have dealt in truth and integrity with Jerubbaal and his house this
day, rejoice in Abimelech, and let him also rejoice in you. ...
biblecc.com/judges/9-19.htm - 13k
Judges 9:16 "Now therefore, if you have dealt in truth and ... ... "Now therefore, if you have dealt in truth and integrity in making ...
if ..... in ..... integrity ..... Jerubbaal ..... ...
biblecc.com/judges/9-16.htm - 14k
2 Peter 1:5 Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence ... ... Because of this, make every effort to add integrity to
your faith; and to integrity add knowledge ...
biblecc.com/2_peter/1-5.htm - 13k
2 Peter 1:3 Seeing that His divine power has granted to us ... ... for life and for godliness. This power was given to us through knowledge
of the one who called us by his own glory and integrity. ...
biblecc.com/2_peter/1-3.htm - 14k
[ More results from biblecc.com/2_peter ]
Amos 5:10 They hate him who reproves in the gate, And they ... They hate him who reproves in the gate, And they abhor him who speaks
with integrity. ... in ..... integrity ..... one ..... ...
biblecc.com/amos/5-10.htm - 12k
1 Chronicles 29:17 "Since I know, O my God, that You try the ... "Since I know, O my God, that You try the heart and delight in uprightness,
I, in the integrity of my heart ... integrity ..... intent ..... ...
biblecc.com/1_chronicles/29-17.htm - 15k
Galatians 2:5 But we did not yield in subjection to them for ... But not for an hour did we give way and submit to them; in order that
the Good News might continue with you in its integrity. ...
biblecc.com/galatians/2-5.htm - 13k
Nehemiah 7:2 Then I put Hanani my brother, and Hananiah the ... ... Hananiah ..... he ..... I ..... in ..... integrity ..... Jerusalem ..... man ..... ...
biblecc.com/nehemiah/7-2.htm - 13k
2 Timothy 2:22 Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue ... ... Keep a strong curb, however, on your youthful cravings; and strive for integrity,
good faith, love, peace, in company with all who pray to the Lord with pure ...
biblecc.com/2_timothy/2-22.htm - 14k
2 Corinthians 8:21 For we have regard for what is honorable, not ... ... For we seek not only God's approval of our integrity, but man's also. ...
biblecc.com/2_corinthians/8-21.htm - 13k
Revelation 19:11 And I saw heaven opened, and behold, a white ... ... I saw heaven standing open. There was a white horse, and its rider is named
Faithful and True. With integrity he judges and wages war. ...
biblecc.com/revelation/19-11.htm - 14k
Joshua 24:14 "Now, therefore, fear the LORD and serve Him in ... ... "Fear the LORD, and serve him with integrity and faithfulness. ...
biblecc.com/joshua/24-14.htm - 13k
Deuteronomy 18:13 "You shall be blameless before the LORD your God ... ... You must have integrity [in dealing] with the LORD your God. ...
biblecc.com/deuteronomy/18-13.htm - 11k
Deuteronomy 9:5 "It is not for your righteousness or for the ... ... he ..... heart ..... in ..... integrity ..... is ..... Isaac ..... It ..... ...
biblecc.com/deuteronomy/9-5.htm - 15k
Isaiah 59:4 No one sues righteously and no one pleads honestly. ... ... his ..... honestly ..... in ..... iniquity .....
integrity ..... justice ..... lies ..... ...
biblecc.com/isaiah/59-4.htm - 13k
Isaiah 45:23 "I have sworn by Myself, The word has gone forth ... has ..... have ..... I ..... in ..... integrity ..... knee ..... me ..... ...
biblecc.com/isaiah/45-23.htm - 13k
Matthew 22:16 And they sent their disciples to Him, along with the ... Herodians ..... him ..... in ..... integrity ..... know ..... man ..... men ..... ...
biblecc.com/matthew/22-16.htm - 15k
Mark 12:14 They came and said to Him, "Teacher, we know that ... God ..... him ..... in ..... integrity ..... Is ..... it ..... know ..... ...
biblecc.com/mark/12-14.htm - 16k
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Worship music from Dan....
Hello Everyone! You see to your right a link called "Worship". This is where I will be sharing some of my favorite music with you. I will try to update it about once a week, so make sure to keep checking back! (Click the link below to bookmark this site)
Add "Jump for Jesus" to your Favorites
Add "Jump for Jesus" to your Favorites
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
under loving command
A word of warning
The primary message of this booklet is to relate to parents our struggle in learning to obey instructions in Scripture from a loving Heavenly Father. Therefore it is a word shared specifically from our experience rather than a technique or method for child rearing. For that, more than these few words would need to be written.
Throughout our experiences we always felt the assurance of our Father's loving attentiveness even during our reluctance to obey. We wanted to give our children the same assurance as we began to train them. Whatever lessons we learned were never intended to gain power over our children in order to manipulate and control their lives. The rod, training, or any form of discipline should never become license for arbitrary commands for the parent's benefit, nor should the home become authoritarian, cold, or militant.
Of all the places on this earth's troubled globe, home must become that place where a child knows throughout his life he will always find unconditional support, love, and forgiveness.., a refuge where his heart, mind, and hopes can find full expression.., a place of pleasant histories where his soul has become a storehouse full of good memories and gratefulness for his parents' loving and gentle care.
— Al Fabrizio
“For I know him [Abraham], that he will command his children and his household after him, and they will keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment; that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he has spoken of him” (Genesis 18:19) (...to bless him and make him a blessing – Gen. 12:2).
Not long ago our three-and-a-half-year-old son prayed, “Lord, help me to look at your eyes and do what you say,” I thought how beautifully he expressed Psalm 32:8-9, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with my eye. Do not be like the horse, or like the mule, which have no understanding; which must be harnessed with bit and bridle.” This is the kind of response we desire in our own lives toward God.., not as the mule with no understanding that needs to be jerked about from one direction to another, but as one with a submissive heart who has already decided to obey and merely waits to be guided with His eye. We pray for this quality of obedience for ourselves and also for our children.
Any victory which God has given in our experience has come as we have been brought to the end of ourselves in failure and defeat. Then He has taken over and done the work in us. There is no other area in our lives where we are more completely cast in dependence on the Lord than with our children.
TRAINING IS MORE THAN TEACHING
In Proverbs 22:6 God promises, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” There is a distinction between training and teaching. Many of us are teaching our children the way they should go, but we are neglecting to train them in the way they should go. A child can be trained to respond to his parents in willing obedience and trust.
The dictionary gives the meaning of the word ‘train’ – “to mold the character, instruct by exercise, drill, to make obedient to orders, to put or point in an exact direction, to prepare for a contest.” This is what God wants us to do with our children.
ALL PARENTS TRAIN THEIR CHILDREN
All of us are training our children in some way.., either consciously or unconsciously. When we ask a child to do something more than once, we are training him to wait until we have told him twice before he obeys.., or we are training him to wait until we have raised our voice before he obeys.., or we are training him to wait until we have threatened him before he obeys. We can train him to obey immediately when we tell him once in a normal conversational tone.
The child who is only taught “the way he should go” can also hear other teaching and depart from the way he has been taught. But the promise to the parent who trains his child is: “WHEN HE IS OLD, HE WILL NOT DEPART FROM IT.”
Here are two examples in Scripture: one in which the child was trained the way he ought to go and the other in which two brothers were taught the way they ought to go, but were not trained.
In I Samuel 1:11, Hannah asked the Lord for a son. She prayed, “If you... will give your servant a son, then I will give him to the Lord.” She did not say, “Lord, if you give me a son, I will do my best to teach him to serve you, and if he is willing and won't object, I will take him up to the tabernacle to serve you.” No, she never doubted that Samuel would do anything else but what she chose for him. I Samuel 1:27 says: “For this child I prayed; and the Lord has given me the petition which I asked of him; therefore also I have lent him to the Lord; as long as he lives, he shall be lent to the Lord. And he worshiped the Lord there.” Samuel did go to the tabernacle and was a willing servant to Eli, the priest. That Samuel had been trained to obey is evident in I Samuel 3 when, as a young boy, he gets out of bed three times to run to Eli and ask him what he wants. And he served God as long as he lived.
In contrast we have the two sons of Eli, the priest, in 1 Samuel 2:12: “Now the sons of Eli were sons of Belial; they knew not the Lord.” The Scripture goes on to tell how Eli's sons were disobedient and immoral. Eli knew what his sons were doing and he no doubt had taught them what was right. In I Samuel 2:23-24, Eli scolds his boys, “And he [Eli] said to them, Why do you do such things? For I hear of your evil dealings from all the people. No, my sons; this is not a good report that I hear; you are making the LORD's people transgress.” But scolding isn't training.
Eli neglected to train his sons: “they did not heed the voice of their father.” And the Lord cut off Eli’s descendants from being priests. I Samuel 3:13 says, “For I have told him that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knows; because his sons made themselves vile, and he did not restrain them.” He honored his sons above the Lord (I Samuel 2:29). Eli loved the Lord, he was sincere, he performed the office of priest, but he did not train his sons to obey.
HOW? (The struggle with myself to do it God’s way)
But how can we train? How can we train our children to obey us? God has given us the answer in His Word. Proverbs 22:15 says, “Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of correction will drive it far from him.”
Oh, but Lord. You surely don't mean I am to use a rod, a stick, on my child. My first thought is, “What am I to be, a policeman with a stick to keep him in line?” I love him too much to want to hurt him. “He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly” (Proverbs 13:24).
Then I argue, but there are other ways of discipline. Words can be rods.., the scolding, a rebuke. “Do not withhold correction from a child, for if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod, and deliver his soul from hell” (Proverbs 23:13-14).
But I want to let him grow up free, without inhibitions. “The rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother" (Proverbs 29:15).
I am tempted to say, “Surely these little disobediences are not serious enough yet. He is so young. I will wait until he is older and I can reason with him and he can understand more. “Chasten your son while there is hope…” (Proverbs 19:18).
But I am afraid if I discipline him he will only rebel more. “Correct your son and he will give you rest; yes, he will give delight to your soul” (Proverbs 29:17).
I had to ask myself… do I believe the Lord means what He says in these verses? Do I believe that if I love my children and want to obey God concerning them that I must take a stick and physically spank them when they disobey? I do believe He means just that. I also believe that if I, by faith, obey His Word, He will fulfill each promise He has given concerning child training.
My obedience to God to train my child requires that every time I ask him to do something, either “come here,” “don't touch,” “hush,” “put that down” - or whatever it is, I must see that he obeys. When I have said it once in a normal tone, if he does not obey immediately, I must take up the switch and spank him enough to hurt so he will not want it repeated. Love demands this.
LOVE WILL PAY THE PRICE
A selfish love always wants an easier way. I can feel a selfish sentiment toward my child and spare myself the pain of seeing him endure suffering and disappointment, sending him into the world unprepared for the natural suffering life will exact from him. But a self-giving love realizes that obedience must come at cost and pain. God demonstrates His special love to His sons whom He trains through suffering. “For whom the LORD loves he chastens, and he scourges every son whom he receives. If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons” (Hebrews 12:6-7). It is put even more strongly later in this portion which says that if God does not chasten us, then we are illegitimate children.
The pain that the rod inflicts on the body delivers one from the pain his character will suffer later in life because of a selfish will. “Blows that hurt cleanse away evil, as do stripes the inward depths of the heart” (Proverbs 20:30).
“I know, O LORD, that your judgments are right, and that in faithfulness you have afflicted me” (Psalm 119:75).
“It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I may learn your statutes” (Psalm 119:71).
“Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word” (Psalm 119:67).
The child who is never trained to discipline himself and bring his will into submission to another will necessarily require chastening as he grows older if he is ever to mature in his obedience toward God. God in His grace will chasten that child, but after years of self will and self indulgence… through what greater suffering? “It is good for a man to bear the yoke in his youth” (Lamentations 3:27).
Using the rod on my child is unpleasant, but immediately after the correcting I can take the child on my lap to comfort and kiss him; I can tell him I love him, but that he must obey. The Lord does this to us, doesn't He? Who of us has not been chastened severely by Him and then known His sweet comfort as He tells us, “I am doing this because I love you.” “Come, and let us return to the LORD, for he has torn, but he will heal us; he has stricken, but he will bind us up” (Hosea 6:1).
A ROD OF LOVE DELIVERS FROM HOSTILITY
This restoration of fellowship is the blessing of the rod. After it is used, after we have chastened, we can completely forget the incident and enjoy the fellowship restored between parent and child. If we continue to nag or scold, we may develop a prolonged alienation or hostility toward the child because he has not yet been corrected and taught to obey. Such nagging on our part only sends a message of fear and punishment rather than of loving attention.
Anger and hostility toward the child is the result of our own disobedience when we parents fail to chasten as God commanded us, or from our delay in obeying until we become frustrated with the child's behavior. That delay and disobedience opens up the dangerous possibility that our frustration will erupt as abusive words or actions toward the child who is simply responding to our inconsistent actions and words. When the rod is used consistently for the slightest disobedience, it is never associated with anger, displeasure, or rejection, because the parent chastens the child with a patient, loving spirit in obedience to God. No matter the nature or the circumstance of the offense, the correction is always the same because the wrong-doing is always one of disobedience. This is the rod of correction which brings hope.
Children soon understand that the rod is saturated with our love and they receive it as loving training for their benefit. The message is not one of a traumatic, judgmental act of punishment for an evil deed, nor a reaction from the parent to “get even” or to strike out in anger with an emotional outburst of scolding or punishment for a list of uncorrected acts. Consistent gentle training with loving chastening is quickly understood as a caring act.
As I was busy getting breakfast one morning I asked our daughter to put on her shoes and socks. I am sure she intended to obey me, but she got busy playing and forgot. I told her to go in and lie across the footstool, because she did not obey me and I must correct her. I was busy in the kitchen and failed to go in immediately as I should have done. When I did, there she was lying on her tummy across the footstool, waiting for her correction, singing, and swinging her feet. She was waiting in complete rest. She accepted the switch as the inevitable result of disobedience. Each one of our children sweetly receives the switch; they realize we use it to train them, because we love them. And afterward, oh how free we are to show them our affection!
I must add another word in relation to this incident. As I corrected my daughter I had to judge myself, because I had done the very thing for which I was chastening her. I also had not obeyed immediately. I was disobedient in delaying the correction. When I saw her sweetly waiting for me, my heart was struck again with my responsibility to hear and obey God in the same way I was training my children to hear and obey.
IS EVERY CHILD DIFFERENT?
A comment we hear so often is, “But every child is different and should be dealt with differently.” We agree that every child is different. We have as much variety of personality and temperament in our four children as any you will find. But they all have one thing in common.., they were all born with a self-centered nature. And each one has required the rod to bring him to a place of submission. Nowhere in Scripture does the Lord qualify His command on the basis of personality.
Let me share two personal illustrations of this. Our youngest boy has a strong temper. It was revealed long before he could talk. When we crossed his will by saying “No” to him, he would not directly disobey. Instead he would throw himself down on the floor and kick and scream. At first I would go over, pick him up, and say, “No, no,” and set him on my lap to make him hush. I realized, however, that though I relieved the situation for the time, I was not training him to live outside himself.
The next time he was disappointed by a “No,” threw himself down and screamed, I spanked him on his bottom right during the middle of his tantrum. Then I went to a chair, set him on my lap, made him hush, and loved and comforted him. He came to the place that when his will was crossed, he would throw himself down, begin to scream, and right in the middle of it catch himself. By the time I got to him with the switch, he was up walking around, busying himself as though everything were fine. Of course, he still got the switch because he had to learn to accept my will immediately. This is what he has learned to do, overcoming tantrums.
Will this training break his spirit? No, only his self-will, that will which is wholly centered in self will be broken. This is the part that requires faith. I believe that as I obey the Lord in this, He will teach our son to subject his will to our loving authority and still develop his personality to the fullest. In fact, it is the disciplined spirit that is free to blossom to its fullest because it is not thrown by circumstances. It is the pruned vine that flourishes and bears the sweetest fruit.
In contrast, our older boy is unusually sensitive and emotional. He has been this way since he was an infant. When he was very young, he would often burst into tears when we asked him to do something he did not want to do. He would burst into tears at the slightest provocation. The tears came with any new situation, happy or sad. We would withhold correction, excusing him on the basis of his sensitivity.
Things got worse instead of better, because he would escape into his tears when he did not want to obey. He was showing more insecurity all the time. I don't believe he did this consciously, but we, in a sense, were training him to give in to his emotions. We reasoned that if we used the rod on him it would only deepen the problem.
The Lord began to convict us about the fact that we were not being obedient to His Word and trusting Him for the result. Finally one evening during our family Bible-reading time, Daddy asked our son to do something he did not want to do, with the usual result… tears. We tried to comfort and coax him, but it only brought on more tears. That night he went to bed without being brought to the place of obedience.
As his dad and I sat there and talked about it, our conviction grew that we were the ones who were not obedient, and that we had to begin to obey immediately for our son's sake. So Daddy went into his room. He put him on his lap and told him that we didn't have peace about what happened. He confessed to our son that we had not been obedient to the Lord who wanted us to be sure that our son obeyed. Daddy told him that he would have to correct him. So he spanked him, held him in his arms and comforted him, had him do the thing he had been asked to do in the first place, then put him back to bed. We know our son went to sleep that night more secure in Daddy's love. He began to see our obedience, and it caused his heart to rest. He needed to see that we were saying “yes” to God in assuming the responsibility to correct his disobedience.
This was a real turning point for both our son and us. After that the Lord gave us the grace to use the rod whenever our son did not obey. He became much more secure and settled and began to learn to live above his emotions. His temperament is the same and he is just as sensitive as ever, but he is learning that issues are more important than his emotions. Before, he evaluated everything by his feelings. When he learned not to be controlled by his emotions, he became much more interested in others and less involved with himself. I have often thought, with this tendency to be so sensitive, how insecure he would be today if we had continued to cater to his tears and our own lack of faith. Now his sensitivity shows in his gift for positive creativity and benefits all of us.
That evening brought another turning point in our son's life. He began to open his heart to the Lord in a new way. It was as though he had been holding back that one area of his heart, and when he discovered that he had to give it up, he was free. His prayers were much more real. He became more attentive and interested in family devotions, and ever since I have never known him to feel anything but warmth and love toward the Lord.
GOD IS TRAINING US
Shouldn't our relationship to our children be a picture of our Heavenly Father's relationship to us? He is our Lord and we, at this point in their lives, are the lord of our children. This necessarily places the responsibility on us to act in the same loving consistency toward our children as our Heavenly Father does toward us.
God is training me as His child even as I train mine. His training teaches me to be very sensitive to what is truly for the good of the child. Tyranny has no place in training. When my Father chastens me, it is an action toward me for my good, not an angry reaction or rejection. “Oh that they had such a heart in them that they would fear me and always keep all my commandments, that it might be well with them and with their children forever!” (Deut. 5:29). “For they (earthly fathers) indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness” (Hebrews 12:10).
To illustrate, let us suppose that my child has just spoken rudely to me (or to his brother). My natural impulse is to feel personally offended and to react in a similarly rude way by chiding and scolding him. But love for the child and obedience to God demand that I take up the rod and chasten patiently, set the child on my lap, and lovingly teach him that he must always speak in a loving way. This is the action of love for the good of the child.
Again, suppose my child wants something very much that may not be best for him. To give in to his desire is to indulge myself. I must for the good of the child take the time and trouble to train him to receive his disappointment with an accepting attitude, trusting in his parents' love for him, believing that they have made the decision that is best for him. Through this he will learn to trust God's will as best for him. If we are faithful to train the child to bring his will into submission to ours, I believe (and have seen) that the child will transfer that submission to God as he grows older. But if he takes our word lightly, he will take God's word lightly.
INCONSISTENT USE OF THE ROD IS NOT TRAINING
To be consistent is so important. What can be more frustrating to a child than to never know quite what to expect from us. It is our inconsistency as parents that provokes and discourages our children. One day we feel stern and say “No” to something. The next day we feel indifferent and preoccupied, and in order to save ourselves the inconvenience, we allow them to go ahead, or we overlook “little” disobediences. When we operate with the rod in this way, it becomes something other than training; it is brute force to make the child cater to our moods. I believe this kind of bullying strengthens a child's resistance to authority. He is provoked to anger, becomes discouraged, and rebels. “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged” (Colossians 3:21). We as parents must be obedient to follow through each time we speak.
But it takes diligence. This is why we cannot possibly do it in our own strength or on the strength of any motive other than obedience to God. The motive to have nice well-behaved children will not carry us. For example, one day I may have lots of initiative and no other distractions. I may tell my child to “Come here.” It is easy now to stop what I am doing in order to do what is necessary to train him if he disobeys. But the next day, I may be settled comfortably in a chair nursing my baby when I tell my child, “Come here, please.” If he disobeys, the motive to have nice well-behaved children is not enough now. It is so much easier to repeat what I said a little sharply. But then I have trained the child to know that I do not really mean what I say the first time. No, it takes His grace to say, “Lord, You have told me to train my children. If I sit here in this chair I will be disobeying You. Please, help me to obey You by training my child to obey.” He then gives me grace to get up out of the chair, put the baby down, take up the switch, use it patiently, take my child on my lap and comfort him. “But he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.”
IT IS AN ACT OF FAITH
Many people have said, “I've tried spanking and it just makes matters worse. It doesn't work.” To begin to operate on the premise of “I'll try it” won't work. To train our children in love with the rod is God's command. It is an act of faith to step out on His promise to fulfill His will in us, strengthened by Him. Faith will not give up because its object is obedience to God and His Word, not to ourselves or some “workable” principles.
When our first child was very small and began to show a selfish will, it was difficult to begin to train her with the switch. We had no idea what the results might be. But God made it clear to us that we were to trust Him and obey. Many well meaning people (some of them religious leaders) sought to discourage us in using the rod, saying the Scriptures were not literal in the use of the word “rod.” They said that there were other forms of discipline..; “words could be rods.” (What could be more cruel than to beat a child with words.) They advocated reasoning and redirecting. We were told our daughter might grow up with “all kinds of psychological problems.”
But God gave us the grace to act in faith that His Word is true. Our daughter will soon be a teenager and we can say, “As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is proven; he is a shield to all who trust in him” (II Samuel 22:31). She is a constant blessing and pleasure to us in every way. Many of the so called “teenage” attitudes were dealt with at age ten and eleven. She is outgoing and interested in others. Most important of all, she loves God and His Word and her spiritual growth is as evident as her physical growth. Her own basic relationship with us has been established. We are still training her; nothing is changed. The rod is still the loving instrument of training for her, and she welcomes it as readily as she did at two.
Of course there will come the time when the rod for her is laid aside and God alone will continue to train her with His own loving rod.., but not yet. Particularly during these very emotional teenage years, it is a blessed instrument of training to deliver us from any need for hostility toward her, or from her toward us. With her heart so sensitive to the Lord, there is immediate repentance and sweet confession. Furthermore our Lord leads both her and us, her parents, to a mutual understanding and acceptance of decisions we must make together.
FREEDOM TO GROW
When we are training our children to obey, we are able to build their lives without being hindered by antagonism. We can help each child grow in the knowledge of God, and the entire family can enjoy a home filled with love, fun and humor, rejoicing in all the work of God in our lives day by day. There is a wonderful freedom in our relationship as we grow together spiritually. We are able to live honestly and openly before our children as examples of dependence on God. “And I will walk at liberty, for I seek your precepts” (Psalm 119:45).
TRAINING THEM TO RECEIVE GOD’S DIRECT GUIDANCE
Discovering the excitement of hearing God speak through His Word begins very early. Our regular family time around the breakfast table, when Daddy reads the Bible and we discuss it together as a family, is a source of growth and strength to us all. But as our children grow older, it becomes increasingly important that they get their guidance and help directly from the Lord. Therefore they need a special time of training in feeding themselves from God's Word. They are learning to study His Word in their own individual quiet time.
What blessings we have received as parents as Dad has taken time with our older boy two mornings a week before work and school to talk over the portions of Scripture they've been studying. With Dad's undivided attention, our son is able to talk about all that's on his heart. He has been able to bring out his questions and face them in the light of the Scriptures with his dad.
Our older daughter and I receive this same blessing as we take time in the morning together, talking over our Bible studies and all the new experiences that growing into a young woman brings.
These are wonderful and exciting days for us with our children. The training process is often painful and unpleasant and requires constant commitment, but the rewards are glorious! “Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful: nevertheless afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12:11).
A WORD OF ENCOURAGEMENT
There have been times when I have felt totally discouraged and defeated in training my children until I thought there is no hope, it's too late, I've lost so much ground that there is no recovery.
We went through a soul-wracking experience concerning our youngest daughter when she was around three years old. We were not being obedient to the Lord in her training. It was very involved, and I am not sure how to explain it except to say we were relying on ourselves and on our own reasoning.., often rationalizing that we did not need to spank her. In many ways we were afraid of her. We disciplined her just enough to maintain order, but we were not training her to truly obey. We allowed her to maintain subtle control over us with an unsubmitted will. We had a whole list of excuses why we were not obeying the Lord in this, but the Lord, in His grace, wouldn't give us peace. He brought us more and more under conviction about it until we were miserable.
I kept telling the Lord, “I can't, I just can't do it.” And He would answer, “I know you can't. Of course not, you never could.” I would say, “I can't” but keep struggling and trying. Finally I literally spent one entire night in tears telling the Lord that I was at the end of myself and that if He wanted my children trained, He would have to do it.
The next morning, after a sleepless night, when the first occasion arose, I took the switch in hand and said, “Okay, Lord, You do it.” And He did. Because I had trained my daughter to be insensitive to my voice, I had to begin all over again to train her to listen. I spoke once and followed through with the switch. Each time as she sat on my lap and I loved and comforted her, I would repeat the words, “Listen to my voice and obey.”
At lunch time that day, after many incidents of correction, she sat down to eat and bowed her little head to pray and thank the Lord for the food. Often before she had prayed, “Lord, teach me to obey.” But today she prayed, “Dear Lord, thank You that I will obey.” She stressed the “will” as though she were saying, “Thank You, Lord, that Mommy is finally obeying You by making me obey. I'm so glad I am not left to myself.”
In the days that followed a beautiful transformation took place. She took on new sparkle, became interested in others, and began to live outside of herself. And what an inexpressible pleasure she became to her mommy and daddy and brothers and sister.
God meets us right where we are. If these principles are new to you and you already have untrained children, know that God will be very gracious to you. It is not too late. In his strength you can begin now to obey Him in what He has revealed to you. Your children will soon learn that because you love them, you are training them to obey. As you step out in faith, you will see that God is doing His work in you..., and in them.
A Word to Fathers
When I asked my wife to write these experiences, I felt that I was united with her in her commitment to train the children in obedience to the Lord. However, I had not faced the struggle to become obedient as a father. I took pride in their development without paying the price of confronting their will. For a long time my wife's obedience was a substitute for my own, and I continually resisted giving clear, thoughtful commands to the children, especially if I thought it might go against their will. I knew that to confront them with a command would force me to submit my will to God. I only used the rod for selected things and for disobediences which my wife saw and pointed out to me but which I often excused inwardly and rationalized away. This divided spirit frustrated much of the training of my wife.
By avoiding my responsibilities, I failed to receive the benefit of God's chastening and training through the spiritual struggle to obey in training my children. I also missed giving the children the trust and hope that they need in their father in order for me to reveal to them God's fatherhood.
But God is Sovereign Father. He has met me with difficult struggles and severe chastening, commanding me to see the need to judge myself and turn my attention from my own self-interests. He has taught me to redirect my work and the use of my time to consider what commands God is giving me to give to my children, and to come under these commands myself. Therefore, each time I command or chasten the children, it is to be my own confession and agreement with God's sovereign right to command me to obey for the good of my children and their children to follow.
I share this as a warning to every father who reads our testimony. It is a fearful thing to use the rod without giving our children holy and righteous commands. It is a fearful thing to judge our children without judging ourselves, for they are God's children as well and we must all come under His righteous Fatherhood.
The primary message of this booklet is to relate to parents our struggle in learning to obey instructions in Scripture from a loving Heavenly Father. Therefore it is a word shared specifically from our experience rather than a technique or method for child rearing. For that, more than these few words would need to be written.
Throughout our experiences we always felt the assurance of our Father's loving attentiveness even during our reluctance to obey. We wanted to give our children the same assurance as we began to train them. Whatever lessons we learned were never intended to gain power over our children in order to manipulate and control their lives. The rod, training, or any form of discipline should never become license for arbitrary commands for the parent's benefit, nor should the home become authoritarian, cold, or militant.
Of all the places on this earth's troubled globe, home must become that place where a child knows throughout his life he will always find unconditional support, love, and forgiveness.., a refuge where his heart, mind, and hopes can find full expression.., a place of pleasant histories where his soul has become a storehouse full of good memories and gratefulness for his parents' loving and gentle care.
— Al Fabrizio
“For I know him [Abraham], that he will command his children and his household after him, and they will keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment; that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he has spoken of him” (Genesis 18:19) (...to bless him and make him a blessing – Gen. 12:2).
Not long ago our three-and-a-half-year-old son prayed, “Lord, help me to look at your eyes and do what you say,” I thought how beautifully he expressed Psalm 32:8-9, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with my eye. Do not be like the horse, or like the mule, which have no understanding; which must be harnessed with bit and bridle.” This is the kind of response we desire in our own lives toward God.., not as the mule with no understanding that needs to be jerked about from one direction to another, but as one with a submissive heart who has already decided to obey and merely waits to be guided with His eye. We pray for this quality of obedience for ourselves and also for our children.
Any victory which God has given in our experience has come as we have been brought to the end of ourselves in failure and defeat. Then He has taken over and done the work in us. There is no other area in our lives where we are more completely cast in dependence on the Lord than with our children.
TRAINING IS MORE THAN TEACHING
In Proverbs 22:6 God promises, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” There is a distinction between training and teaching. Many of us are teaching our children the way they should go, but we are neglecting to train them in the way they should go. A child can be trained to respond to his parents in willing obedience and trust.
The dictionary gives the meaning of the word ‘train’ – “to mold the character, instruct by exercise, drill, to make obedient to orders, to put or point in an exact direction, to prepare for a contest.” This is what God wants us to do with our children.
ALL PARENTS TRAIN THEIR CHILDREN
All of us are training our children in some way.., either consciously or unconsciously. When we ask a child to do something more than once, we are training him to wait until we have told him twice before he obeys.., or we are training him to wait until we have raised our voice before he obeys.., or we are training him to wait until we have threatened him before he obeys. We can train him to obey immediately when we tell him once in a normal conversational tone.
The child who is only taught “the way he should go” can also hear other teaching and depart from the way he has been taught. But the promise to the parent who trains his child is: “WHEN HE IS OLD, HE WILL NOT DEPART FROM IT.”
Here are two examples in Scripture: one in which the child was trained the way he ought to go and the other in which two brothers were taught the way they ought to go, but were not trained.
In I Samuel 1:11, Hannah asked the Lord for a son. She prayed, “If you... will give your servant a son, then I will give him to the Lord.” She did not say, “Lord, if you give me a son, I will do my best to teach him to serve you, and if he is willing and won't object, I will take him up to the tabernacle to serve you.” No, she never doubted that Samuel would do anything else but what she chose for him. I Samuel 1:27 says: “For this child I prayed; and the Lord has given me the petition which I asked of him; therefore also I have lent him to the Lord; as long as he lives, he shall be lent to the Lord. And he worshiped the Lord there.” Samuel did go to the tabernacle and was a willing servant to Eli, the priest. That Samuel had been trained to obey is evident in I Samuel 3 when, as a young boy, he gets out of bed three times to run to Eli and ask him what he wants. And he served God as long as he lived.
In contrast we have the two sons of Eli, the priest, in 1 Samuel 2:12: “Now the sons of Eli were sons of Belial; they knew not the Lord.” The Scripture goes on to tell how Eli's sons were disobedient and immoral. Eli knew what his sons were doing and he no doubt had taught them what was right. In I Samuel 2:23-24, Eli scolds his boys, “And he [Eli] said to them, Why do you do such things? For I hear of your evil dealings from all the people. No, my sons; this is not a good report that I hear; you are making the LORD's people transgress.” But scolding isn't training.
Eli neglected to train his sons: “they did not heed the voice of their father.” And the Lord cut off Eli’s descendants from being priests. I Samuel 3:13 says, “For I have told him that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knows; because his sons made themselves vile, and he did not restrain them.” He honored his sons above the Lord (I Samuel 2:29). Eli loved the Lord, he was sincere, he performed the office of priest, but he did not train his sons to obey.
HOW? (The struggle with myself to do it God’s way)
But how can we train? How can we train our children to obey us? God has given us the answer in His Word. Proverbs 22:15 says, “Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of correction will drive it far from him.”
Oh, but Lord. You surely don't mean I am to use a rod, a stick, on my child. My first thought is, “What am I to be, a policeman with a stick to keep him in line?” I love him too much to want to hurt him. “He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly” (Proverbs 13:24).
Then I argue, but there are other ways of discipline. Words can be rods.., the scolding, a rebuke. “Do not withhold correction from a child, for if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod, and deliver his soul from hell” (Proverbs 23:13-14).
But I want to let him grow up free, without inhibitions. “The rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother" (Proverbs 29:15).
I am tempted to say, “Surely these little disobediences are not serious enough yet. He is so young. I will wait until he is older and I can reason with him and he can understand more. “Chasten your son while there is hope…” (Proverbs 19:18).
But I am afraid if I discipline him he will only rebel more. “Correct your son and he will give you rest; yes, he will give delight to your soul” (Proverbs 29:17).
I had to ask myself… do I believe the Lord means what He says in these verses? Do I believe that if I love my children and want to obey God concerning them that I must take a stick and physically spank them when they disobey? I do believe He means just that. I also believe that if I, by faith, obey His Word, He will fulfill each promise He has given concerning child training.
My obedience to God to train my child requires that every time I ask him to do something, either “come here,” “don't touch,” “hush,” “put that down” - or whatever it is, I must see that he obeys. When I have said it once in a normal tone, if he does not obey immediately, I must take up the switch and spank him enough to hurt so he will not want it repeated. Love demands this.
LOVE WILL PAY THE PRICE
A selfish love always wants an easier way. I can feel a selfish sentiment toward my child and spare myself the pain of seeing him endure suffering and disappointment, sending him into the world unprepared for the natural suffering life will exact from him. But a self-giving love realizes that obedience must come at cost and pain. God demonstrates His special love to His sons whom He trains through suffering. “For whom the LORD loves he chastens, and he scourges every son whom he receives. If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons” (Hebrews 12:6-7). It is put even more strongly later in this portion which says that if God does not chasten us, then we are illegitimate children.
The pain that the rod inflicts on the body delivers one from the pain his character will suffer later in life because of a selfish will. “Blows that hurt cleanse away evil, as do stripes the inward depths of the heart” (Proverbs 20:30).
“I know, O LORD, that your judgments are right, and that in faithfulness you have afflicted me” (Psalm 119:75).
“It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I may learn your statutes” (Psalm 119:71).
“Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word” (Psalm 119:67).
The child who is never trained to discipline himself and bring his will into submission to another will necessarily require chastening as he grows older if he is ever to mature in his obedience toward God. God in His grace will chasten that child, but after years of self will and self indulgence… through what greater suffering? “It is good for a man to bear the yoke in his youth” (Lamentations 3:27).
Using the rod on my child is unpleasant, but immediately after the correcting I can take the child on my lap to comfort and kiss him; I can tell him I love him, but that he must obey. The Lord does this to us, doesn't He? Who of us has not been chastened severely by Him and then known His sweet comfort as He tells us, “I am doing this because I love you.” “Come, and let us return to the LORD, for he has torn, but he will heal us; he has stricken, but he will bind us up” (Hosea 6:1).
A ROD OF LOVE DELIVERS FROM HOSTILITY
This restoration of fellowship is the blessing of the rod. After it is used, after we have chastened, we can completely forget the incident and enjoy the fellowship restored between parent and child. If we continue to nag or scold, we may develop a prolonged alienation or hostility toward the child because he has not yet been corrected and taught to obey. Such nagging on our part only sends a message of fear and punishment rather than of loving attention.
Anger and hostility toward the child is the result of our own disobedience when we parents fail to chasten as God commanded us, or from our delay in obeying until we become frustrated with the child's behavior. That delay and disobedience opens up the dangerous possibility that our frustration will erupt as abusive words or actions toward the child who is simply responding to our inconsistent actions and words. When the rod is used consistently for the slightest disobedience, it is never associated with anger, displeasure, or rejection, because the parent chastens the child with a patient, loving spirit in obedience to God. No matter the nature or the circumstance of the offense, the correction is always the same because the wrong-doing is always one of disobedience. This is the rod of correction which brings hope.
Children soon understand that the rod is saturated with our love and they receive it as loving training for their benefit. The message is not one of a traumatic, judgmental act of punishment for an evil deed, nor a reaction from the parent to “get even” or to strike out in anger with an emotional outburst of scolding or punishment for a list of uncorrected acts. Consistent gentle training with loving chastening is quickly understood as a caring act.
As I was busy getting breakfast one morning I asked our daughter to put on her shoes and socks. I am sure she intended to obey me, but she got busy playing and forgot. I told her to go in and lie across the footstool, because she did not obey me and I must correct her. I was busy in the kitchen and failed to go in immediately as I should have done. When I did, there she was lying on her tummy across the footstool, waiting for her correction, singing, and swinging her feet. She was waiting in complete rest. She accepted the switch as the inevitable result of disobedience. Each one of our children sweetly receives the switch; they realize we use it to train them, because we love them. And afterward, oh how free we are to show them our affection!
I must add another word in relation to this incident. As I corrected my daughter I had to judge myself, because I had done the very thing for which I was chastening her. I also had not obeyed immediately. I was disobedient in delaying the correction. When I saw her sweetly waiting for me, my heart was struck again with my responsibility to hear and obey God in the same way I was training my children to hear and obey.
IS EVERY CHILD DIFFERENT?
A comment we hear so often is, “But every child is different and should be dealt with differently.” We agree that every child is different. We have as much variety of personality and temperament in our four children as any you will find. But they all have one thing in common.., they were all born with a self-centered nature. And each one has required the rod to bring him to a place of submission. Nowhere in Scripture does the Lord qualify His command on the basis of personality.
Let me share two personal illustrations of this. Our youngest boy has a strong temper. It was revealed long before he could talk. When we crossed his will by saying “No” to him, he would not directly disobey. Instead he would throw himself down on the floor and kick and scream. At first I would go over, pick him up, and say, “No, no,” and set him on my lap to make him hush. I realized, however, that though I relieved the situation for the time, I was not training him to live outside himself.
The next time he was disappointed by a “No,” threw himself down and screamed, I spanked him on his bottom right during the middle of his tantrum. Then I went to a chair, set him on my lap, made him hush, and loved and comforted him. He came to the place that when his will was crossed, he would throw himself down, begin to scream, and right in the middle of it catch himself. By the time I got to him with the switch, he was up walking around, busying himself as though everything were fine. Of course, he still got the switch because he had to learn to accept my will immediately. This is what he has learned to do, overcoming tantrums.
Will this training break his spirit? No, only his self-will, that will which is wholly centered in self will be broken. This is the part that requires faith. I believe that as I obey the Lord in this, He will teach our son to subject his will to our loving authority and still develop his personality to the fullest. In fact, it is the disciplined spirit that is free to blossom to its fullest because it is not thrown by circumstances. It is the pruned vine that flourishes and bears the sweetest fruit.
In contrast, our older boy is unusually sensitive and emotional. He has been this way since he was an infant. When he was very young, he would often burst into tears when we asked him to do something he did not want to do. He would burst into tears at the slightest provocation. The tears came with any new situation, happy or sad. We would withhold correction, excusing him on the basis of his sensitivity.
Things got worse instead of better, because he would escape into his tears when he did not want to obey. He was showing more insecurity all the time. I don't believe he did this consciously, but we, in a sense, were training him to give in to his emotions. We reasoned that if we used the rod on him it would only deepen the problem.
The Lord began to convict us about the fact that we were not being obedient to His Word and trusting Him for the result. Finally one evening during our family Bible-reading time, Daddy asked our son to do something he did not want to do, with the usual result… tears. We tried to comfort and coax him, but it only brought on more tears. That night he went to bed without being brought to the place of obedience.
As his dad and I sat there and talked about it, our conviction grew that we were the ones who were not obedient, and that we had to begin to obey immediately for our son's sake. So Daddy went into his room. He put him on his lap and told him that we didn't have peace about what happened. He confessed to our son that we had not been obedient to the Lord who wanted us to be sure that our son obeyed. Daddy told him that he would have to correct him. So he spanked him, held him in his arms and comforted him, had him do the thing he had been asked to do in the first place, then put him back to bed. We know our son went to sleep that night more secure in Daddy's love. He began to see our obedience, and it caused his heart to rest. He needed to see that we were saying “yes” to God in assuming the responsibility to correct his disobedience.
This was a real turning point for both our son and us. After that the Lord gave us the grace to use the rod whenever our son did not obey. He became much more secure and settled and began to learn to live above his emotions. His temperament is the same and he is just as sensitive as ever, but he is learning that issues are more important than his emotions. Before, he evaluated everything by his feelings. When he learned not to be controlled by his emotions, he became much more interested in others and less involved with himself. I have often thought, with this tendency to be so sensitive, how insecure he would be today if we had continued to cater to his tears and our own lack of faith. Now his sensitivity shows in his gift for positive creativity and benefits all of us.
That evening brought another turning point in our son's life. He began to open his heart to the Lord in a new way. It was as though he had been holding back that one area of his heart, and when he discovered that he had to give it up, he was free. His prayers were much more real. He became more attentive and interested in family devotions, and ever since I have never known him to feel anything but warmth and love toward the Lord.
GOD IS TRAINING US
Shouldn't our relationship to our children be a picture of our Heavenly Father's relationship to us? He is our Lord and we, at this point in their lives, are the lord of our children. This necessarily places the responsibility on us to act in the same loving consistency toward our children as our Heavenly Father does toward us.
God is training me as His child even as I train mine. His training teaches me to be very sensitive to what is truly for the good of the child. Tyranny has no place in training. When my Father chastens me, it is an action toward me for my good, not an angry reaction or rejection. “Oh that they had such a heart in them that they would fear me and always keep all my commandments, that it might be well with them and with their children forever!” (Deut. 5:29). “For they (earthly fathers) indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness” (Hebrews 12:10).
To illustrate, let us suppose that my child has just spoken rudely to me (or to his brother). My natural impulse is to feel personally offended and to react in a similarly rude way by chiding and scolding him. But love for the child and obedience to God demand that I take up the rod and chasten patiently, set the child on my lap, and lovingly teach him that he must always speak in a loving way. This is the action of love for the good of the child.
Again, suppose my child wants something very much that may not be best for him. To give in to his desire is to indulge myself. I must for the good of the child take the time and trouble to train him to receive his disappointment with an accepting attitude, trusting in his parents' love for him, believing that they have made the decision that is best for him. Through this he will learn to trust God's will as best for him. If we are faithful to train the child to bring his will into submission to ours, I believe (and have seen) that the child will transfer that submission to God as he grows older. But if he takes our word lightly, he will take God's word lightly.
INCONSISTENT USE OF THE ROD IS NOT TRAINING
To be consistent is so important. What can be more frustrating to a child than to never know quite what to expect from us. It is our inconsistency as parents that provokes and discourages our children. One day we feel stern and say “No” to something. The next day we feel indifferent and preoccupied, and in order to save ourselves the inconvenience, we allow them to go ahead, or we overlook “little” disobediences. When we operate with the rod in this way, it becomes something other than training; it is brute force to make the child cater to our moods. I believe this kind of bullying strengthens a child's resistance to authority. He is provoked to anger, becomes discouraged, and rebels. “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged” (Colossians 3:21). We as parents must be obedient to follow through each time we speak.
But it takes diligence. This is why we cannot possibly do it in our own strength or on the strength of any motive other than obedience to God. The motive to have nice well-behaved children will not carry us. For example, one day I may have lots of initiative and no other distractions. I may tell my child to “Come here.” It is easy now to stop what I am doing in order to do what is necessary to train him if he disobeys. But the next day, I may be settled comfortably in a chair nursing my baby when I tell my child, “Come here, please.” If he disobeys, the motive to have nice well-behaved children is not enough now. It is so much easier to repeat what I said a little sharply. But then I have trained the child to know that I do not really mean what I say the first time. No, it takes His grace to say, “Lord, You have told me to train my children. If I sit here in this chair I will be disobeying You. Please, help me to obey You by training my child to obey.” He then gives me grace to get up out of the chair, put the baby down, take up the switch, use it patiently, take my child on my lap and comfort him. “But he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.”
IT IS AN ACT OF FAITH
Many people have said, “I've tried spanking and it just makes matters worse. It doesn't work.” To begin to operate on the premise of “I'll try it” won't work. To train our children in love with the rod is God's command. It is an act of faith to step out on His promise to fulfill His will in us, strengthened by Him. Faith will not give up because its object is obedience to God and His Word, not to ourselves or some “workable” principles.
When our first child was very small and began to show a selfish will, it was difficult to begin to train her with the switch. We had no idea what the results might be. But God made it clear to us that we were to trust Him and obey. Many well meaning people (some of them religious leaders) sought to discourage us in using the rod, saying the Scriptures were not literal in the use of the word “rod.” They said that there were other forms of discipline..; “words could be rods.” (What could be more cruel than to beat a child with words.) They advocated reasoning and redirecting. We were told our daughter might grow up with “all kinds of psychological problems.”
But God gave us the grace to act in faith that His Word is true. Our daughter will soon be a teenager and we can say, “As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is proven; he is a shield to all who trust in him” (II Samuel 22:31). She is a constant blessing and pleasure to us in every way. Many of the so called “teenage” attitudes were dealt with at age ten and eleven. She is outgoing and interested in others. Most important of all, she loves God and His Word and her spiritual growth is as evident as her physical growth. Her own basic relationship with us has been established. We are still training her; nothing is changed. The rod is still the loving instrument of training for her, and she welcomes it as readily as she did at two.
Of course there will come the time when the rod for her is laid aside and God alone will continue to train her with His own loving rod.., but not yet. Particularly during these very emotional teenage years, it is a blessed instrument of training to deliver us from any need for hostility toward her, or from her toward us. With her heart so sensitive to the Lord, there is immediate repentance and sweet confession. Furthermore our Lord leads both her and us, her parents, to a mutual understanding and acceptance of decisions we must make together.
FREEDOM TO GROW
When we are training our children to obey, we are able to build their lives without being hindered by antagonism. We can help each child grow in the knowledge of God, and the entire family can enjoy a home filled with love, fun and humor, rejoicing in all the work of God in our lives day by day. There is a wonderful freedom in our relationship as we grow together spiritually. We are able to live honestly and openly before our children as examples of dependence on God. “And I will walk at liberty, for I seek your precepts” (Psalm 119:45).
TRAINING THEM TO RECEIVE GOD’S DIRECT GUIDANCE
Discovering the excitement of hearing God speak through His Word begins very early. Our regular family time around the breakfast table, when Daddy reads the Bible and we discuss it together as a family, is a source of growth and strength to us all. But as our children grow older, it becomes increasingly important that they get their guidance and help directly from the Lord. Therefore they need a special time of training in feeding themselves from God's Word. They are learning to study His Word in their own individual quiet time.
What blessings we have received as parents as Dad has taken time with our older boy two mornings a week before work and school to talk over the portions of Scripture they've been studying. With Dad's undivided attention, our son is able to talk about all that's on his heart. He has been able to bring out his questions and face them in the light of the Scriptures with his dad.
Our older daughter and I receive this same blessing as we take time in the morning together, talking over our Bible studies and all the new experiences that growing into a young woman brings.
These are wonderful and exciting days for us with our children. The training process is often painful and unpleasant and requires constant commitment, but the rewards are glorious! “Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful: nevertheless afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12:11).
A WORD OF ENCOURAGEMENT
There have been times when I have felt totally discouraged and defeated in training my children until I thought there is no hope, it's too late, I've lost so much ground that there is no recovery.
We went through a soul-wracking experience concerning our youngest daughter when she was around three years old. We were not being obedient to the Lord in her training. It was very involved, and I am not sure how to explain it except to say we were relying on ourselves and on our own reasoning.., often rationalizing that we did not need to spank her. In many ways we were afraid of her. We disciplined her just enough to maintain order, but we were not training her to truly obey. We allowed her to maintain subtle control over us with an unsubmitted will. We had a whole list of excuses why we were not obeying the Lord in this, but the Lord, in His grace, wouldn't give us peace. He brought us more and more under conviction about it until we were miserable.
I kept telling the Lord, “I can't, I just can't do it.” And He would answer, “I know you can't. Of course not, you never could.” I would say, “I can't” but keep struggling and trying. Finally I literally spent one entire night in tears telling the Lord that I was at the end of myself and that if He wanted my children trained, He would have to do it.
The next morning, after a sleepless night, when the first occasion arose, I took the switch in hand and said, “Okay, Lord, You do it.” And He did. Because I had trained my daughter to be insensitive to my voice, I had to begin all over again to train her to listen. I spoke once and followed through with the switch. Each time as she sat on my lap and I loved and comforted her, I would repeat the words, “Listen to my voice and obey.”
At lunch time that day, after many incidents of correction, she sat down to eat and bowed her little head to pray and thank the Lord for the food. Often before she had prayed, “Lord, teach me to obey.” But today she prayed, “Dear Lord, thank You that I will obey.” She stressed the “will” as though she were saying, “Thank You, Lord, that Mommy is finally obeying You by making me obey. I'm so glad I am not left to myself.”
In the days that followed a beautiful transformation took place. She took on new sparkle, became interested in others, and began to live outside of herself. And what an inexpressible pleasure she became to her mommy and daddy and brothers and sister.
God meets us right where we are. If these principles are new to you and you already have untrained children, know that God will be very gracious to you. It is not too late. In his strength you can begin now to obey Him in what He has revealed to you. Your children will soon learn that because you love them, you are training them to obey. As you step out in faith, you will see that God is doing His work in you..., and in them.
A Word to Fathers
When I asked my wife to write these experiences, I felt that I was united with her in her commitment to train the children in obedience to the Lord. However, I had not faced the struggle to become obedient as a father. I took pride in their development without paying the price of confronting their will. For a long time my wife's obedience was a substitute for my own, and I continually resisted giving clear, thoughtful commands to the children, especially if I thought it might go against their will. I knew that to confront them with a command would force me to submit my will to God. I only used the rod for selected things and for disobediences which my wife saw and pointed out to me but which I often excused inwardly and rationalized away. This divided spirit frustrated much of the training of my wife.
By avoiding my responsibilities, I failed to receive the benefit of God's chastening and training through the spiritual struggle to obey in training my children. I also missed giving the children the trust and hope that they need in their father in order for me to reveal to them God's fatherhood.
But God is Sovereign Father. He has met me with difficult struggles and severe chastening, commanding me to see the need to judge myself and turn my attention from my own self-interests. He has taught me to redirect my work and the use of my time to consider what commands God is giving me to give to my children, and to come under these commands myself. Therefore, each time I command or chasten the children, it is to be my own confession and agreement with God's sovereign right to command me to obey for the good of my children and their children to follow.
I share this as a warning to every father who reads our testimony. It is a fearful thing to use the rod without giving our children holy and righteous commands. It is a fearful thing to judge our children without judging ourselves, for they are God's children as well and we must all come under His righteous Fatherhood.
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